13 Vindictive Krampus Gifts to Give Naughty Loved Ones

Think Christmas is too commercial? Are your kids spoiled and out of control? Well, take heart: It's Krampus season! For those who missed the Alpine folklore lesson (or the 2015 movie starring Adam Scott), Krampus is an anthropomorphic goat-ish creature who punishes misbehaving children, sometimes by throwing them in a sack and hitting them. We don't actually condone handing your kids over to a demonic goat, but we'll take the story as a good behavior incentive over Elf on the Shelf any day. Here are some gifts celebrating the darker side of Christmas.

1. ORNAMENT; $10

Every tree needs at least one Krampus ornament to balance out all the cheery Santas and elves. This glass ornament features the lovable demon sitting on a sack of wailing children. Put this item on the tree and the rest of the ornaments are sure to stay in line.

Find It: Amazon

2. SWEATER; $35

Show up to your next sweater party in something a little different. With patterned chains and a particularly goat-y image of Krampus on the front, this get-up is sure to make fellow party guests second-guess another glass of spiked eggnog. It says gruss vom Krampus or "greetings from Krampus."

Find It: Amazon

3. STOCKING; $12

This ominous felt stocking will give friends and family pause. Will they find small presents, or coal? If the frightened-looking children are any indication, it's going to be coal; and at 16 inches long, this stocking can fit enough to power a tiny train.

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4. SHIRT; $7-$16

This cotton t-shirt is great for the Scrooge in your life this holiday season—or every day if they really hate children. The design of Krampus stuffing children into his basket is professionally screenprinted onto the shirt so it can be worn for many Christmases to come.

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5. PILLOWCASE; $4

As the holidays roll around, it's time to break out the decorative towels and tiny soaps for the bathroom. The living room can also get a makeover with a few of these surprisingly affordable pillow cases, which fit snugly over 20-inch pillows. The linen covers feature Krampus sneaking up on some unsuspecting children, branch in hand.

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6. HOLIDAY CARDS; $16

This vintage-style batch of cards comes in a metal tin with Krampus's scary mug painted on the top. There are two cards of each design, with 20 cards in total. Each menacing card comes with its own bright red envelope that says "Christmas fun." The cards' pictures range from Krampus chaining up crying children to the goat-demon taking a few kids on a joyride around town.

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7. MASK; $30

Want to really scare your grandmother this holiday? Just pop on this alarming latex mask and hide behind the tree. It has gold-painted horns and a long tongue that puts Gene Simmons to shame.

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8. CINNAMON CANDY CANES; $5

If candy canes are the official candy of Santa Claus, then these fiery cinnamon candy canes belong to Krampus. The devilish candies sport red-and-black stripes that will look great next to the Krampus ornament.

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9. WRAPPING PAPER; $11

This wrapping paper sends a loud and clear message to the recipient: "OK, you get a gift this year, but watch it." Alternatively, you can use it to wrap up some lumps of coal and call it a day. Each pack comes with two 20-by-30 inch sheets—perfect when your whole family has been up to no good.

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10. PATCH; $8

Add an edge to your denim jacket, tote bag, girl scout uniform, or any other piece of clothing that could use a threatening yet festive touch. The digitally embroidered patch has an iron-on back for a quick application.

Find It: Etsy

11. ENAMEL PIN; $12

For something a little less permanent, jackets and accessories can be adorned with this soft enamel pin. The 1.5-inch-tall pin shows Krampus with his signature birch branches and basket of naughty children. Despite its seasonal subject matter, the simple design lets the wearer enjoy the pin all year round.

Find It: Etsy

12. SOY CANDLE; $20

Nothing says relaxation like cuddling up near a long-tongued Christmas demon candle. The soy wax candles are handmade in a mold with eco-friendly dye. The 5-inch figures come in either red or green for the holidays.

Find It: Etsy

13. THE KRAMPUS AND THE OLD, DARK CHRISTMAS; $16

Read up on the rich history of the child-abusing demon with this fascinating tome from author Al Ridenour. Ridenour takes an anthropological approach by visiting places in Austria to experience the Krampus festivities first-hand. Readers can dive into the complex mythology and culture that produced Santa's spiritual foil.

Find It: Amazon