Man Opens Can of Beans, Finds Just One Bean
In Heinz-sight, Steve Smith should’ve ordered take-out for his Tuesday night dinner.
The 41-year-old Conservative councilor in Bristol, England told The Independent that he returned home late from a residents’ meeting and tore open the last can of Heinz Beanz from a multipack in the cupboard.
What he found inside would’ve broken the spirit of even the most steadfast optimist: A pathetic, lone bean drowned in a sea of savory-yet-unsatisfying bean juice.
Smith handled the catastrophe the old-fashioned way, by tweeting a video of his miserable meal and tagging the culpable corporation.
Hi Steve, sorry to see this, please DM us your details and codes from underneath the can, thanks
— Heinz (@HeinzUK) September 4, 2019
“I thought it was funny—but annoying,” Smith told The Independent. “I thought they might see the funny side.” Heinz responded with an apology and a request for Smith’s details, hopefully to offer him a lifetime supply of beans.
To put it in perspective, an average can of Heinz contains around 465 beans, enough to make your intestines groan. Smith said he eats a can every couple weeks.
Man opens can of baked beans to find ‘bean juice and only one bean’ https://t.co/91efObqdUB
— The Independent (@Independent) September 5, 2019
For those of you worried that the woebegone bloke went to bed famished, you can rest assured that this story has a happy ending ... at least if you associate happy endings with eggs. Smith scrambled some up to fill the leguminous void in his stomach (and his heart).
[h/t The Independent]