How Mayor McCheese Helps Explain a Plausible Theory of Time Travel

McDonaldland, the setting of McDonald’s marketing efforts throughout the 1970s and ‘80s, was a magical place populated by talking cheeseburgers, fry goblins, and whatever Grimace was supposed to be. While it may seem like the stuff of delirious fantasy, McDonaldland stayed grounded in one regard: time travel. In fact, if you want to better understand a specific theoretical aspect of time travel endorsed by Carl Sagan and Stephen Hawking, look to McDonaldland—specifically, Mayor McCheese.

Between 1971 and 1985, Mayor McCheese served as the mayor of McDonaldland. While McCheese was a integral part of McDonaldland in its early years, he was slowly phased out and didn’t appear again in any official capacity for McDonald’s (save a single Sears advertisement) until 1999. Because he is a politician, there naturally was a scandal involved.

In 1970, ad agency Needham Harper & Steers approached Sid and Marty Krofft, the creators of H.R. Pufnstuf, about using characters from the hit children’s show for a campaign they were pitching to McDonald’s. Before any progress could be made, the agency told the Kroffts that the campaign had been canceled. However, the next year, McDonald’s aired the first of their McDonaldland commercials, and the Kroffts believed that the feel and design were directly plagiarized from the world they had created for H.R. Pufnstuf. They sued the McDonald’s Corporation, and much of their case revolved around Mayor McCheese’s similarities to Pufnstuf.

The case went to trial in 1973, and lawyers for McDonald’s argued Mayor McCheese was sufficiently different from the Kroffts’ creation:

"'Pufnstuf' wears what can only be described as a yellow and green dragon suit with a blue cummerbund from which hangs a medal which says 'mayor'. 'McCheese' wears a version of pink formal dress—'tails'—with knicker trousers. He has a typical diplomat's sash on which is written 'mayor', the 'M' consisting of the McDonald's trademark of an 'M' made of golden arches."

Neither the jury nor an appeals court bought this defense, and the case was settled in 1977 with the McDonald’s Corporation ordered to pay damages to the Kroffts. McDonaldland had become extremely popular by then, but it was around the time of this legal headache that McDonald’s started to move away from the campaign. One of the first casualties was Mayor McCheese, who stopped getting speaking roles in ads and was seen less and less until 1985, when he appeared in his final commercial for the fast food company (it also starred Mary Lou Retton).

Mayor McCheese appears in the McDonaldland universe only once more, and his presence is thanks to a time machine (and theoretical physics).

In 1998, McDonald’s commissioned Klasky Csupo, the production company behind popular shows like Rugrats and Aaahh!!! Real Monsters, to make a series of direct-to-video cartoons based around a rebranded Ronald McDonald (he was skinnier and had sideburns). Six episodes of The Wacky Adventures of Ronald McDonald were released on VHS. In the penultimate episode, “Have Time, Will Travel,” Ronald and company discover a time machine. It is through this time machine that we finally reunite with Mayor McCheese:

“This was part of McDonaldland … in the ‘70s,” Ronald says as he steps out of the time machine and into a disco where Mayor McCheese is partying.

“Well I’ll be a burger in bellbottoms,” Mayor McCheese says. “I just learned the latest dance craze: The Hustle!” McCheese then performs a rather accurate version of The Hustle for 15 full seconds.

Now, if you are familiar with Stephen Hawking’s work on space-time and how it relates to humanity’s potential to engage in time travel, you will know that this encounter with Mayor McCheese recalls a major paradox: “If sometime in the future we learn to travel in time,” Hawking writes, “why hasn't someone come back from the future to tell us how to do it?”

According to Hawking, there are plausible explanations for this:

“A possible way to reconcile time travel, with the fact that we don't seem to have had any visitors from the future, would be to say that it can occur only in the future. In this view, one would say space-time in our past was fixed, because we have observed it, and seen that it is not warped enough, to allow travel into the past.”

Carl Sagan made a similar argument during an interview with NOVA in the 1990s: “Maybe backward time travel is possible, but only up to the moment that time travel is invented. We haven't invented it yet, so they can't come to us. They can come to as far back as whatever it would be, say A.D. 2300, but not further back in time.”

So, time travel may indeed be possible, but you can’t go back any further than the point at which the time machine was first invented. This kind of thinking would make Ronald McDonald and Mayor McCheese’s disco reunion impossible unless the time machine had already been invented by the 1970s. Well, it just so happens that McDonaldland did have a time machine, and they had it at the precise moment for this scenario to be plausible.

In the 1975 McDonaldland commercial “Time Machine,” Ronald, McCheese, and Grimace encounter a time machine. The year is important here. When they go back to the ‘70s in The Wacky Adventures of Ronald McDonald, Mayor McCheese says he “just” learned a new dance, "The Hustle." And when did Van McCoy release his smash hit single “The Hustle”? You guessed it: 1975.

Mayor McCheese’s return is only made possible because McDonaldland adheres to the strict laws of time travel. It's the reason two pieces of McDonald’s marketing ephemera made nearly a quarter-century apart and by different creative teams could remain so in sync. It also could be why McDonald’s wasn’t sued again, for this was the same Mayor McCheese from 1975, two years before the lawsuit with the Kroffts was settled.

Science is so elegant when it's simple like this.

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Alexa Can Now Help You Find a Wine Pairing
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iStock

Even if you enjoy wine regularly, you may not know exactly how you’re supposed to pair it with food. But you don’t have to be a sommelier to put together a good pairing at home. According to Lifehacker, you can just ask Alexa.

An Alexa skill called Wine Finder is designed to help you figure out which wine varietal would go best with whatever food you’re planning to eat. You just have to ask, “What wine goes well with … ”

Created by an app developer called Bloop Entertainment, the Amazon Echo skill features a database with 500 wine pairings. And not all of them are designed for someone working their way through Mastering the Art of French Cooking. The skill will also help you find the proper pairing for your more casual snacks. In one demo, the skill recommends pairing nachos with a Sauvignon blanc or Zinfandel. (Note that the latter also goes well with Frito pie.)

You can also ask it to find you the perfect wine to drink with apple pie and pizza, in addition to the meats, cheeses, and other wine-pairing staples you might expect. However, if you ask it what to pair with hot dogs, it says “water,” which is an affront to hot dog connoisseurs everywhere.

There are a few other wine-pairing skills available for Alexa, including Wine Pairings, Wine Pairings (two different skills), and Wine Expert. But according to user reviews, Wine Finder is the standout, offering more and higher-quality suggestions than some of the other sommelier apps.

It’s free to enable here, so drink up.

[h/t Lifehacker]

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Elsie Hui, Flickr // CC BY 2.0
Sam's Club Brings $.99 Polish Hot Dogs to All Stores After They're Cut From Costco's Food Courts
Elsie Hui, Flickr // CC BY 2.0
Elsie Hui, Flickr // CC BY 2.0

In early July, Costco angered many customers with the announcement that its beloved Polish hot dog was being removed from the food court menu. If you're someone who believes cheap meat tastes best when eaten in a bulk retail warehouse, Sam's Club has good news: The competing big box chain has responded to Costco's news by promising to roll out Polish hot dogs in all its stores later this month, Business Insider reports.

The Polish hot dog has long been a staple at Costco. Like Costco's classic hot dog, the Polish dog was part of the food court's famously affordable $1.50 hot dog and a soda package. The company says the item is being cut in favor of healthier offerings, like açai bowls, organic burgers, and plant-based protein salads.

The standard hot dog and the special deal will continue to be available in stores, but customers who prefer the meatier Polish dog aren't satisfied. Fans immediately took their gripes to the internet—there's even a petition on Change.org to "Bring Back the Polish Dog!" with more than 6500 signatures.

Now Sam's Clubs are looking to draw in some of those spurned customers. Its version of the Polish dog will be sold for just $.99 at all stores starting Monday, July 23. Until now, the chain's Polish hot dogs had only been available in about 200 Sam's Club cafés.

It's hard to imagine the Costco food court will lose too many of its loyal followers from the menu change. Polish hot dogs may be getting axed, but the popular rotisserie chicken and robot-prepared pizza will remain.

[h/t Business Insider]

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