Bored with your Twitter feed? Freshen it up with some follows. We have a few suggestions...
1. NYT MINUS CONTEXT
the coolest guy in the room, as long as you can overlook minor character flaws like murderousness and an affinity for sexual blackmail
— NYT Minus Context (@NYTMinusContext) January 31, 2016
As its name suggests, NYT Minus Context takes lines from New York Times articles and presents them sans context. The results are weird, wonderful, and very often funny.
2. SIR MICHAEL
Very important new poster I stuck up in town today. This is a matter of great urgency. pic.twitter.com/xUdvUDP4X4
— Sir Michael (@Michael1979) January 20, 2016
Michael writes absurd advertisements, posts them in public places, and takes pictures for his Sir Michael Twitter feed. Michael’s entire feed is funny, but if you want to see all his posters, check them out here.
edited light olive green
Londony dirty pink pic.twitter.com/YZEdrYF7va
— colorschemer (@colorschemez) January 31, 2016
The feed colorschemer is a bot that automatically generates random combinations of colors, then posts a photo of them. As you might imagine, the results are a mixed bag: Some are great; others, not so much. (The description admits that the bot isn’t very good at it “because I'm a robot with no sense of style.”)
4. EVERY COLOR
— Every Color (@everycolorbot) February 3, 2016
If colorschemer is too complicated—or too hard on the eyes—Every Color is a bot that Tweets a new color every hour, with its hex code. That’s all. The account has more than 63,000 followers.
5. 50 NERDS OF GREY
'Come over,' she begged. 'I need you right now!'
'Just turn it off and on again,' he sighed. He hated these late night rebooty calls.
— 50 Nerds of Grey (@50NerdsofGrey) September 7, 2015
50 Nerds of Grey crosses 50 Shades of Grey with stereotypical nerdery. The result is a ever-renewing supply of jokes and puns that are only dirty in your mind.
6. DAD JOKE HAN SOLO
We had Chinese food and Ben couldn't use chopsticks
Me: "Use the forks" Ben
Ben: Bad joke Dad
Me: Would you say it was "FORCEd"?#2for1!
— Dad Joke Han Solo (@dadjokehansolo) January 30, 2016
When Han Solo became a dad, he began to spout dad jokes, the same way all men do when they find their young child will laugh at anything. The problem is that they never stop, even when you're grown and no longer find them as funny as you once did. Dad Joke Han Solo delivers Star Wars puns both clever and lame.
7. EMO KYLO REN
can you come pick me up
my tauntaun died
please hurry it is quite cold
— Emo Kylo Ren (@KyloR3n) January 22, 2016
why do i even come here pic.twitter.com/ZPIdDATzfD
— Emo Kylo Ren (@KyloR3n) January 28, 2016
Kylo Ren may be the new bad guy in the Star Wars saga, but he’s also immature and wears his feelings on his sleeve. The Twitter feed Emo Kylo Ren makes that very evident. He's a sensitive soul who writes poetry and only trashes his surroundings occasionally. There’s a running joke about how no one can spell his chosen name correctly.
8. TOUGH LOVE LEIA
Until you've seen a masked, black-clad, lightsaber-wielding dark lord curled up on a couch with a Harry Potter book, you haven't seen much.
— Tough Love Leia (@ToughLeia) February 3, 2016
Leia has her own account in this universe. Tough Love Leia is the voice of reason, but she sees the absurdity among the other characters. Through her account, we learn that Ben (a.k.a. Kylo Ren) is an avid Harry Potter fan, a fact that embarrasses him. Moms are like that.
9. VERY LONELY LUKE
I'm the only one here.
That means I'm the sexiest man on the planet.
And the ugliest.
Now I feel terrible.
— Very Lonely Luke (@VeryLonelyLuke) February 2, 2016
Luke is still part of the family, but is separated from the others. They only keep in touch via his Twitter account, Very Lonely Luke. It would be depressing if it weren't so funny.
The above four Twitter accounts communicate with each other often.
RISE & SHINE BUSY DADS! Sunday is your day. Ask your wife to babysit for a couple of hours so you can do the laundry. 'Me time'.
— manwhohasitall (@manwhohasitall) January 17, 2016
A Twitter feed by manwhohasitall poses the question, “Can men ever really ‘have it all’?” Ha! It’s a Twitter account that takes things that women hear all the time—sexist remarks, pandering magazine headlines, and nasty internet comments—and turns them around to be about men. It appears to be partly machine-generated, with “man” and “Dad” replacing “woman” and “Mom,” for example, with some human input to make it even more absurd. Read it for advice to men on getting all that stuff done, and looking good doing it. Then treat yourself to some “me time,” if you have any left.
11. YOU ARE DOG NOW
— YouAreDogNow (@YouAreDogNow) January 24, 2016
— YouAreDogNow (@YouAreDogNow) January 24, 2016
Have you ever wanted to be a dog? What dog would you be? You might find out by submitting a picture to the Twitter account You Are Dog Now. The person or persons behind it will go to great lengths to find a dog image that matches your appearance, expression, position, location, accessories, and whatever else it takes to make you a dog.
— ♥アスキーアートbot (@TwitAA_bot) February 2, 2016
TwitAA_bot is a Japanese feed you don’t have to read to enjoy (although you can toggle a translation). Each post has ASCII art of cats or bears or other images; the dancing cats in the tweet above are labeled Friday, Saturday, and Sunday.