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15 Bizarre Star Wars-Branded Products

Star Wars is one of the most profitable movie franchises in history, partly because of its seemingly endless supply of branded merchandise and movie tie-in products. Lucasfilm is famous for granting product licenses to just about any company that wants to sell Star Wars merchandise, but sometimes it just goes too far. Here are 15 bizarre Star Wars-branded products.

1. STAR WARS EARLY BIRD CERTIFICATE PACKAGE

With the surprise success of the original Star Wars in 1977, demand and excitement for the space opera was so high and rampant that its official toy licensee, Kenner, couldn’t fill demand for the upcoming busy Christmas shopping season. The toy company’s solution? Sell a Star Wars Early Bird Certificate Package, which was simply an empty box ... with a promise. If you bought the package for $7.99 (about $31 in today’s dollars) and sent in the mail-in certificate postcard, Kenner would send you Luke Skywalker, Princess Leia, R2-D2, and Chewbacca action figures six months later. It was extremely successful and proved people will buy just about anything with the words “Star Wars” on it—even an empty box. An unopened and sealed package can go for about $8000 on eBay.

2. REVENGE OF THE SITH AIR SICKNESS BAGS 

In 2005, Virgin Atlantic partnered with LucasArts to promote the then-new Revenge of the Sith video game. Four limited-edition Star Wars air sickness bags were made for all transatlantic flights. One bag included instructions on how to operate a lightsaber, while others featured a diagram of what’s inside of a lightsaber and how a Jedi Knight duels a Sith Lord. Another featured an airplane’s seating chart which highlighted the Light and Dark Sides of the Force. 

3. C-3PO TAPE DISPENSER

 No Star Wars fan’s desk is complete without a C-3PO tape dispenser. After the release of The Empire Strikes Back, Sigma made an all-ceramic tape dispenser featuring C-3PO in a very awkward position. It’s weird to grab a piece of tape from a droid’s crotch, but an original C-3PO tape dispenser goes for about $200 on eBay, so it might be worth it.

4. STAR WARS APPLES

The Bothan Spy

Nothing says Star Wars like ... a bushel of apples? A number of grocery store chains across the country are stocking Star Wars brand apples. The Sage Fruit Company licensed Star Wars for their brand of red delicious apples, which come in a plastic bag with Darth Vader on the front and Yoda and a Stormtrooper on the back. The Sage Fruit Company also sells officially licensed Sesame Street and Disney’s Frozen branded apples. 

5. WAMPA ARM ICE SCRAPER

ThinkGeek

Remember when Luke Skywalker cut off the Wampa’s arm at the beginning of The Empire Strikes Back? In 2012, ThinkGeek had the bright idea to make an ice scraper that looked like a plush severed Wampa arm for your car’s windshield. It’s a good way to scrape ice on your car and keep your arm warm while you’re doing it. 

6. STAR WARS COFFEE CREAMER

Nestle and Lucasfilm teamed up for the release of The Force Awakens with officially licensed Star Wars Coffee-mate creamers. Nestle released five limited-edition Coffee-mate flavors and bottles, including Darth Vader Espresso Chocolate, C-3PO Hazelnut, Chewbacca Spiced Latte, R2-D2 French Vanilla, and Boba Fett Italian Sweet Cream—any one of which pairs well with Darth Vader's Dark Side Roast Coffee

7. CHOP SABERS 

According to Obi-Wan Kenobi in A New Hope, a lightsaber is the “formal weapon of a Jedi Knight. Not as clumsy or random as a blaster. More skill than simple sight was required for its use. An elegant weapon.” But to the people at Samurai Market in Japan, a pair of tiny lightsabers can also be used as chopsticks.

8. DARTH VADER BLACK BURGER AND JEDI BURGER

As part of a promotion for the 3-D re-release of The Phantom Menace in 2012, French fast food chain Quick offered a Darth Vader Dark Burger, which was a double cheeseburger with spicy piquant pepper sauce on a jet-black bun. Quick also offered a less exciting jalapeno Jedi Burger with mayonnaise on a ciabatta bun.

9. STAR WARS FISHING KIT

Fishing gear manufacturer Shakespeare released a line of Star Wars-themed fishing gear, including tackle boxes, backpacks, and lightsaber-shaped fishing rods. The fishing kit came with Star Wars: The Clone Wars decals for the kids.

10. LANDO CALRISSIAN DISGUISE KIT

Dangerous Minds

Available exclusively during Star Wars Celebration V in Orlando in 2010, the Lando Calrissian Disguise Kit was simply a stick-on mustache that made you look like the scoundrel of Cloud City.

11. STAR WARS TOILET PAPER

In 2005, German household paper company Zewa partnered with Lucasfilm for the release of Revenge of the Sith. They offered limited edition Yoda action figures with the purchase of officially licensed Star Wars toilet paper combo packs.

12. TAUNTAUN SLEEPING BAGS

ThinkGeek

If you ever wanted to be warm and cozy inside of a Tauntaun just like Luke Skywalker in The Empire Strikes Back, then ThinkGeek has got you covered. Though it started out as a clever April Fool’s joke in 2009, the Tauntaun Sleeping Bag quickly turned into one of the most sought after movie tie-in products on the Internet. Demand was so high for the Star Wars sleeping bag that ThinkGeek acquired a license from Lucasfilm to officially manufacture and sell the item.

13. STAR WARS PORCELAIN CHINA SET

Gearfuse

No special occasion is complete without your limited-edition Star Wars china set. Impress your family and friends with your deep devotion to a galaxy far, far away and fine tableware with this beautifully crafted—and classy—porcelain china featuring such beloved Star Wars characters as Darth Vader, R2-D2, Yoda, and Chewbacca.   

14. AMPLE HILLS ICE CREAM

Ample Hills

Beloved Brooklyn ice cream company Ample Hills is getting in on The Force Awakens action with two limited edition, Star Wars-themed flavors: The Light Side is a marshmallow ice cream with homemade crispie clusters and handmade cocoa crispies (“to represent the dark side still lurking within the light,” according to the company). The Dark Side is an ultra-dark chocolate ice cream, chock full of espresso fudge brownies, cocoa crispies, and white chocolate pearls.

15. JAR JAR BINKS LOLLIPOP

Funny Junk

The infamous Jar Jar Binks lollipop from The Phantom Menace might just be the most bizarre movie tie-in product ever released with any Star Wars film. It was a push-up style lollipop with the Gungan’s hideous reptile-like tongue as the sweet candy inside. Who thought it would be a good idea to make a candy where kids actively French kiss Jar Jar?

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Pop Culture
Solve a Murder Mystery (and Eat Cheesecake) with The Golden Girls
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Something is rotten in the city of Miami. A murder has been committed—and nobody knows who’s behind the dastardly crime. The police are likely no match for the killer, so it’s up to the Golden Girls characters to combine their wits (over cheesecake, of course) to crack the case. But they can’t do it without your help.

That’s right: Peddler’s Village, a quaint shopping village in Lahaska, Pennsylvania, is now offering a Golden Girls Murder Mystery dinner and show every Friday and Saturday night through August 25, 2018. The whodunit takes place at Peddler's Pub at the Cock 'n Bull Restaurant, at 7 p.m.

While the major plot details have been kept under wraps (it is a murder mystery, after all), we do know that Dorothy, Blanche, Rose, and Sophia have "invited a couple of well known detectives to join the party and discuss their famous capers." And given that the show is titled "The Golden Girls: The Curse of Jessica Fletcher," we can only guess (and hope) that an amateur sleuth from Cabot Cove, Maine will be making an appearance.

It's not the first time Peddler's Pub has hosted the gals from Miami; the current show is a sequel of sorts to the original Golden Girls Murder Mystery that Peddler's Pub put on back in 2016. Fun fact: Mental Floss Editor-in-Chief Erin McCarthy beat out a room full of other Betty White sangria-drinking armchair detectives to correctly solve the mystery during its original run. (She has the mug to prove it.)

Tickets are $69.95 per person, and you can make a reservation (which is required) by calling 215-794-4051. As for what you'll be dining on: You can scope out the menu online (and yes, the Girls’ favorite dessert is involved).

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Pop Culture
Cheerleaders and Chicken Suits: Funko is Releasing Several Special Edition Deadpool POPs!

Marvel’s “Merc With a Mouth” is not only getting a sequel—he’s also getting some new swag. Deadpool, the sardonic superhero/villain in red spandex, will soon be immortalized in a new line of special edition Funko POP! vinyl toys.

In keeping with the franchise's eccentric sense of humor, there will be several outlandish outfits to choose from, each one sold exclusively by a different retailer. Among the outfit options Funko lovers will find are a mermaid get-up (complete with starfish bra) at Target; a cheerleader uniform for BoxLunch; a king’s robe and crown at FYE; and a chicken suit for Amazon shoppers. There’s even one of Deadpool holding a chimichanga while wearing ninja gear for 7-Eleven.

These parody dolls seem to be keeping in character with the Deadpool films, which themselves are parodies of the superhero genre. The title character, played by Ryan Reynolds, often breaks the fourth wall in order to poke fun at both DC and Marvel. (The filmmakers also famously signed off on spending $10,000 for a quick shot of the unlikely superhero wearing a tank top with Golden Girl Bea Arthur's face on it.)

The figures will be out this summer following the release of Deadpool 2 on May 18, 2018. Funko also recently released its royal family line of POP! dolls, depicting Britain’s longest-reigning monarch, Elizabeth II, and her kin.

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