We can't say for sure whether these discontinued treats were too good or too bad for this world, but we can guarantee that they made eating and drinking a lot more interesting. Here's to you, long gone flavors. We hardly knew ye.
1. SCHWEDDY BALLS // BEN & JERRY’S
Perhaps better known for its name and origin as a Saturday Night Live skit than its actual flavor, Schweddy Balls consisted of vanilla ice cream with a “hint” of rum paired with fudge-covered rum and malt balls. The holiday favorite made its way to shelves as a limited season batch in 2011 and now rests peacefully among the others in the Ben & Jerry’s “Flavor Graveyard.”
2. MAPLE MACCHIATO // STARBUCKS
Starbucks stores in the U.S. lost the Maple Macchiato sometime in 2012, and now it lives where it belongs: in Canada. The drink contains what the company called regionally appropriate “Layers of rich espresso, steamed milk and vanilla topped with real #Quebec maple syrup drizzle from the Beauce-Appalache region.”
3. HABANERO GINGER // KETTLE CHIPS
The Kettle website suggests trying the Spicy Thai flavor of their chips to fill the void left by Habanero Ginger, but that particular mix of spicy goodness can never really be replaced.
4. ORANGE CREAM // POP TARTS
Pop Tarts aren’t really known for venturing too far from their classic flavors, but the brand has taken a few leaps over the years to varying degrees of success. The limited edition Orange Cream flavor debuted alongside Chocolate Banana Split, and was discontinued in 2009.
5. FUN // JONES SODA
What does Fun taste like? Now we’ll never know.
6. 1ST DEGREE BURN BLAZIN’ JALAPENO // DORITOS
Fans have said goodbye to so many amazing Doritos, but since the chip really thrives on being EXTREME and JACKED, it seems only right to call out one of their more hyperbolic taste sensations. In case first degree burns aren't extreme enough for you, it should be noted that “2nd Degree Burn Fiery Buffalo” and “3rd Degree Burn Scorchin' Habanero” flavors also made it onto store shelves.
7. COUNTRY KWENCHER // BOONE’S FARM
8. SALTED CARAMEL BBQ // BUFFALO WILD WINGS
Among the retired flavors at the restaurant chain is this honey BBQ sauce with a “drizzle of caramel and a dash of salt.” Sweet and salty lovers are still hurting over this one.
9. LEMON ICE // GATORADE
Lemon Ice is sort of the McRib of the sports hydration world. If you do a little digging online you’ll see that the flavor has a rabid fan base that actively reports on news and findings surrounding the semi-retired, but occasionally available thirst quencher.
10. CHEESEBURGER CRACKER // COMBOS
The folks over at Combos run a pretty tight ship, listing only eight flavors on their products page. But there are a handful of discontinued flavors, including Mustard Pretzel, Peanut Butter Pretzel, Peanut Butter Cracker, Bacon, Egg and Cheese Cracker, and Cheeseburger Cracker. The company has teased fans in the past, bringing back the Cheeseburger Cracker variety for a stint in 2008 and again for a brief period in 2010, but don't expect to pick up a bag of the crunchy snack anytime soon.
11. PITCH BLACK // MOUNTAIN DEW
Coca-Cola and Pepsi get a lot of attention for their discontinued flavors, but Mountain Dew has racked up quite a few as well. The dark purple, grape-flavored Dew was originally released in 2004 for Halloween and then re-released in 2011. In years since it’s been released elsewhere around the world, and has a legion of followers who monitor its movements. “Pitch Black 2”—a sour grape variety—was released in 2005 and disappeared as quickly as it arrived.
12. SOURS // ALTOIDS
Altoids Sours arrived 2004 in five distinctly non-minty flavors: raspberry, lime, apple, tangerine, and mango. The candies, packaged in a round tin, were discontinued in February 2010 due to low demand, but can still be found on eBay and occasionally Amazon, if your long-dormant cravings just became active again.
13. WHYTE 2K CHOCOLATE OVERLOAD // BASKIN ROBBINS
The turn of the millennium was a crazy moment in history, and since there’s really no better way to cope with uncertainty and the unending march of time than ice cream, Baskin Robbins created an ode to Y2K with “Whyte 2K Chocolate Overload”—a swirl of chocolate and white chocolate mousse ice creams with white and dark chocolate chips and chunks. They, too, have a catalog of retired flavors if you need a place to mourn the loss.
14. ELEMENTS // SNAPPLE
“Earth,” “Rain,” “Sun,” and “Fire” were the original elements in this short-lived Snapple line from the early 2000s. People are still asking for their return, but it seems these fundamental forces remain elusive.
15. FIZZL’D FRUITS // SKITTLES
Along with “Blenders” and “Riddles,” the Fizzle Fruits variety of Skittles with fizzing powder coating failed to capture the hearts of candy lovers and were discontinued in 2012. For further reading: the complete list of Skittles flavors is actually pretty astounding.