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10 Famous Movies With Direct-to-Video Sequels Nobody Remembers

We see them everywhere, but they rarely warrant more than a cocked head and a bemused glance. They’ve been around since (at least) the mid-1990s, most of them are terrible, and (in large part) we can thank/blame Disney for their very existence.

They are the “direct-to-video” sequels.

We probably didn’t think all that much of it when Disney released The Return of Jafar for the VHS market back in 1994; at the time it probably seemed like a perfectly logical way to keep a popular franchise rolling along without devoting an inordinate amount of time or money to the final product. The logic seems to be that if a film is produced specifically for the home video market, then everyone involved (from the studio all the way down to the viewer) assumes there will be a tangible—albeit hopefully not unacceptable—dip in overall quality.

Disney opted to bail on the DTV sequel market back in 2007, but the damage was done. All the other home video departments in Hollywood jumped in to fill the void. And you can pretty much guess what happened: virtually any genre film that made a half-decent showing at the box office was suddenly eligible for a series of DTV sequels. And while not all of these movies are awful (Wrong Turn 2, for example, is better than a lot of theatrically-released slasher-style sequels), the vast majority are pretty slipshod affairs. (Though even when a DTV sequel is good, as in the case of some Undisputed and Universal Soldier entries, there’s still an unpleasant stigma attached to the films.) So instead of shining a spotlight on the worst DTV sequels, we thought it’d be more amusing to focus on the strangest ones. The ones that make you do a double-take while walking through Target and think “WTF?”

1. Slap Shot 2: Breaking the Ice (2002)

This is about when we knew that no classic was safe, that any film could warrant a DTV sequel, and that curiosity can often lead to truly painful experiences. The original Slap Shot (1977) is an absolute classic about hockey, violence, loyalty, and profanity. So when Universal decided to exploit the title, hire Stephen Baldwin, and bring back the infamous Hanson brothers for a late-arriving non-sequel, we had to check it out. Suffice to say that the trailer is better than the actual movie, if only because it’s much shorter. The producers tried to squeeze one more drop of blood out of this stone in 2008 with the “kid-friendly” Slap Shot 3: The Junior League, which makes one wonder if those producers have ever actually seen the original Slap Shot.

2. Lost Boys: The Thirst (2010)

Whether you’re old enough to have seen it in theaters or young enough to appreciate an all-star vampire ensemble, there’s no denying that The Lost Boys (1987) is still a pretty cool horror flick. But instead of mounting a full-bore sequel or another remake, WB decided to go the DTV route with this property, and the result was ... not great. Lost Boys: The Tribe, released in 2008, was a clear indication that there’d be little to no connection to the original film (aside from the presence of Corey Feldman, of course), and this second DTV sequel was dire enough to kill the whole series. Odds are that the next rendition will be a remake, and it will almost certainly be better than these low-rent semi-sequels.

3. Hellraiser 9: Revelations (2011)

This movie (and that’s being nice) is actually known as Hellraiser: Revelations, but we added the numeral in there just to underline the fact that, yes, there have been eight Hellraiser sequels. The original 1987 film played in theaters, of course, as did parts two, three, and (to a lesser degree) four, but since that time we’ve been treated to DTV Hellraiser sequels with titles like Inferno, Hellseeker, Deader, Hellworld, and Revelations. Simply put: you'd be hard pressed to find worse horror sequels than the last few Hellraiser movies, but there is a method to this madness: the producers keep churning out those sequels so that they can retain the rights to the franchise, which in turn allows them to produce the remake they’ve been talking about for five years. That remake better be pretty damn amazing if it’s going to make up for Revelations, which is not merely atrocious, but is the first in the series to not cast Doug Bradley as Pinhead. (Which is super lame.)

4. Marley & Me: The Puppy Years (2011)

How do you make a sequel to a family tearjerker in which the title character (huge spoiler alert!) dies at the end? Well, if you’re the producers of the tragically popular Marley & Me (2008), you not only go the DTV route, you also go full prequel and give the puppy an audible monologue, not unlike what we saw in the classic 1993 comedy Look Who’s Talking Now. Just try to make it all the way through this trailer without thinking of how the first film ended. We dare you.

5. A Christmas Story 2 (2012) 

This one really makes us angry. It’s as if someone at WB Home Video finally realized that, “Wow, 1983’s A Christmas Story is still a very profitable movie all these years later. And so obviously what the marketplace demands is a shoddy stinkhole of a non-sequel that uses the title (and the font!) of the original film, but nothing in the way of its wit, warmth, or quality.” It’s not just that the original movie is so damn good; it’s also that the “sequel” is little more than a desperately unfunny collection of references to the 1983 Bob Clark classic. If you want a “sorta sequel” to A Christmas Story, ignore this piece of junk and go dig up 1994’s My Summer Story (a.k.a. It Runs in the Family), which is actually quite charming.

6. Tooth Fairy 2 (2012)

The first Tooth Fairy (2010) isn’t exactly a family classic, but the idea of Dwayne Johnson as the title character contributed (at least) a small dash of novelty to the proceedings. The sorta-sequel replaces The Rock with—wait for it—Larry the Cable Guy. Yeah. Because we all know how much little kids adore spending 90 minutes with ... Larry the Cable Guy. Given the choice, kids would probably opt to go to bed early instead of staying up late to watch this clunky, mirthless mess. But apparently someone at Fox Home Entertainment thought Lawrence of Cable Repair did a great job because, well, check out the next sequel on this list …

7. Jingle All The Way 2 (2014)

First Larry the Cable Guy replaced The Rock in Tooth Fairy 2, and here he’s replacing Arnold Schwarzenegger in a powerfully terrible “sequel” to 1996’s (also powerfully terrible) Jingle All the Way. Both Jingle All the Way movies display mean-spirited humor, atrocious writing, and a grossly wrong-headed message about holiday consumerism ... but only one has Larry the Cable Guy in it.

8. The Scorpion King 4: Quest for Power (2015)

Yep. Part 4. Which means that this is the third sequel to a spinoff of a sequel to a remake. Who knew that 1999’s The Mummy would turn out to be the “original” source of so much schlock? Of course The Rock (the first Scorpion King) is long gone by now, but in his place we’ve gotten Randy Couture (Part 2), Dave Bautista (Part 3), and Victor Webster (Part 4). Each of the sequels is broad, goofy, and sloppily made, but they sometimes actually work as Saturday afternoon matinee adventure flicks. And it’s not like the first Scorpion King was some sort of classic.

9. Dragonheart 3: The Sorcerer’s Curse (2015)

Although not a huge hit at the box office in 1996, the original Dragonheart has gone on to become a bona fide cult favorite, thanks to cable and home video—so of course it had to spawn at least two late-arriving video sequels. Dragonheart: A New Beginning (2000) didn’t exactly produce any sort of new beginning for the series, which laid dormant for another 15 years before someone at Universal decided to try again. The Sorcerer’s Curse is goofy, low-budget adventure fare all the way, but to be fair it’s a slight improvement over its predecessor. All things being relative, that is.

10. Lake Placid vs. Anaconda (2015)

We all remember Anaconda (1997), but do you recall the sequels? Part 2 (Anacondas: Hunt for the Blood Orchid) played in theaters, while Part 3 (The Offspring) and Part 4 (Trail of Blood) did not. How about Lake Placid (1999), the low-key and dryly amusing killer croc flick? Well that one spawned no less than three DTV sequels of its own. So obviously the producers decided that the franchises should combine forces for a Part 5—and therefore we’ve been graced with a film called, you guessed it, Lake Placid vs. Anaconda, which makes no sense grammatically (a lake fighting a snake?) but does feature all sorts of wacky animal brawls. And let’s face it: if you’ve already seen four Lake Placid movies and four Anaconda movies, you’re probably more than happy to sit down with a Part 5 combination platter.

And that’s pretty much why DTV sequels exist in the first place: because movie geeks are nothing if not loyal to their favorite movies—even when they probably shouldn’t be.

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25 Dapper Outfit Choices for Fashionable Pets
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iStock

Lavishing your furry friends with adorable attire is a benefit of pet ownership that they don't mention on the adoption forms. Whether you prefer practical clothing like sweaters and jackets or statement pieces like bow ties and tutus, these dapper duds are perfect for a howl-iday or "gotcha day" gift, or simply for saying, "Who's the cutest little pupper in pajamas? You are!"

1. CASHMERE DOG SWEATER; FROM $165

dog in sweater
Canine Styles

This classic cable-knit cashmere sweater is a sophisticated look for Fido or Finn. Get it from Canine Styles, a luxury dog emporium in New York City that has plenty of posh and preppy outfits.

Find It: Canine Styles

2. TOGGLE DOG COAT; $85

dog in coat
Canine Styles

This toggle coat (available in orange, navy, and tan) is as fashionable as it is warm. Made of Melton wool, it has Velcro closures to make getting dressed easy. It's great for long walks in the country.

Find It: Canine Styles

3. DOG TUXEDO; FROM $90

Dog in tuxedo
Etsy

This satin tuxedo is perfect for the canine members of your wedding party, though it will brighten up any other occasion as well. The custom, handmade outfit comes complete with a snappy bow tie.

Find It: Etsy

4. DOG BELLE DRESS; FROM $45

Dog Belle Dress
Etsy

The queen of your castle can feel like a Disney princess in her very own version of Belle's iconic yellow dress from Beauty and the Beast. This ball gown is made from yellow crepe satin with chiffon overlay on the bodice and features hand-painted gold detailing on the skirt. Enchanted rose not included.

Find It: Etsy

5. POODLE SKIRT OUTFIT FOR DOGS; $26

Rubies Pink Fifties Girl Pet Costume
Amazon

What if you could buy a 1950s poodle skirt for your poodle? This retro dress is comprised of a pink poodle skirt, striped bodice, and sequined belt, and comes with a bow headband.

Find It: Amazon

6. RIBBED CROCHET BUNNY SWEATER; $25

bunny in a sweater
Etsy

Your snuggle-bunny will look like a little fancy-pants in this ribbed crochet sweater. Choose from seven colors, including this dashing deep red.

Find It: Etsy

7. BESPOKE MONOGRAM DOG SWEATER; FROM $155

Dog in sweater
Ruby Rufus

Bespoke clothing isn't just for humans: British luxury dog clothing brand Ruby Rufus will make your pooch a custom monogram sweater made with 100 percent Italian cashmere. You can even order it in your dog's favorite color.

Find It: Ruby Rufus

8. HOT PINK DOG TUTU; $17

Dog in hot pink tutu
Etsy

Tutus look absolutely adorable on tiny humans and animals alike. If your pooch wants to get in touch with its inner ballerina, then grab this hot pink number from Etsy. Rave reviews are a sure thing.

Find It: Etsy

9. PINK DOG POLO SHIRT; $35

Dog Pink Polo Shirt
Canine Styles

This pink polo shirt is perfect for your preppy fur baby. It features not one but a veritable multitude of crocodiles. They'll be the most dapper dog at the country club.

Find It: Canine Styles

10. DOG BARN COAT WITH BROWN CORDUROY COLLAR; $85

Dog in barn coat
Canine Styles

When it's time for a walk, your dog will look effortlessly chic in this fancy barn coat. It comes in navy, cranberry, orange, hot pink, and loden and features convenient pockets for anyone with opposable thumbs.

Find It: Canine Styles

11. WHITE PET NECK RUFF; $26

Pet Neck Ruff
Etsy

Your canine or kitty will look like their painting belongs in London's National Portrait Gallery with this Elizabethan neck ruff.

Find It: Etsy

12. CHICKEN SWEATER; $25

chicken wearing sweater
Etsy

Chickens can get cold when they're strutting around outside. A sweater (well, more like sweater vest) for your bird can also help prevent feather picking during molting season. Or, it can simply keep them warm while they stare pensively across a snowy landscape.

Find It: Etsy

13. PET CIRCLE SCARF; $15

dog in scarf
Etsy

An infinity scarf is a perfect burst of color on a dreary early morning walk. The proprietor of Mitten Made on Etsy originally designed this wool snood for her miniature Dachshund to help keep her warm during the long, cold winters in Michigan.

Find It: Etsy

14. FAB DOG TRAVEL RAINCOAT; FROM $18

Fab Dog Travel Raincoat
Chewy

This timeless yellow rain slicker will look great on any puppy when it's raining cats and dogs. It's made of 100 percent waterproof nylon shell that keeps fur dry. Bonus: It's perfect for an It Halloween costume.

Find It: Chewy

15. LACE CAT OR DOG COLLAR; FROM $10

cat in lace collar
Etsy

This handmade, white lace collar is a must-have for fancy felines. It's also embellished with a large rhinestone.

Find It: Etsy

16. FITWARM PENGUIN PAJAMAS FOR DOGS; FROM $10

Fitwarm Cute Penguin Xmas Dog Pajamas
Amazon

Keep your pupper warm on cold winter nights with these penguin PJs. They're great for doggie sleepovers or lazy weekends on the couch watching Netflix.

Find It: Amazon

17. PLAID CASHMERE DOG COAT; FROM $225

dog in plaid coat
Canine Styles

Your dog will look like a proper gentleman in this smart plaid peacoat. This fine garment is made of cashmere with a faux fur lining and leather buttons, and is a perfect shield against chill and fog.

Find It: Canine Styles

18. SATIN PET BOW TIE; FROM $8

Satin Bow Tie for Dog
Etsy

This satin doggie bow tie is perfect for any occasion. It comes in several colors and features a Velcro fastener that makes it easy to attach to a collar. Plus, 10 percent of every sale goes to charity: specifically to SPCA (Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals) and Feeding Pets of the Homeless.

Find It: Etsy

19. RED DOG DRESS; FROM $34

dog in dress
Etsy

Your good boy or girl will look red carpet-ready in this elegant gown. The voluminous tulle skirt is to die for, and each bow is embellished with beads. Custom orders are also available.

Find It: Etsy

20. DOG TIE; FROM $13

Dog tie
Etsy

Your pooch will be ready to stun at any black tie event. This tie is designed like a collar, making it easy to dress your four-legged friend. This Etsy store gives back: 10 perfect of all sales are donated to an animal protection association.

Find It: Etsy

21. NAUTICAL DOG DRESS WITH MATCHING LEASH; $20

Dog sailor dress
BaxterBoo

Perfect for a day on the town or setting sail in a schooner, this is the sailor outfit you never knew your best furry friend needed. This vintage throwback also comes with a matching leash.

Find It: BaxterBoo

22. TARTAN FLANNEL PET BOW TIE; $5.50

tartan pet bow tie
Etsy

Your dog or cat will turn heads in this flannel tartan bow tie. It has a convenient elastic loop that slides over your pup's collar.

Find It: Etsy

23. PUCCI DOG SHIRT; $23

dog in Pucci dog shirt
Etsy

Only the fanciest dogs wear, err, Pucci. Grab this punny "designer" t-shirt for your pup. This high-quality cotton statement piece is perfect for small breeds.

Find It: Etsy

24. PINK POLKA DOT AND LACE DOG HARNESS DRESS; $20

Pink Polka Dot and Lace Designer Dog Harness Dress
BaxterBoo

This feminine pink polka dot dress is simply adorable. It features a convenient built-in harness and comes with a matching leash.

Find It: BaxterBoo

25. PET SWEATER VEST; $6

pet sweater vest
Amazon

Your dog or cat will look like an erudite Oxford professor in this sweater vest. Note that the button on the pocket is shaped like a bone.

Find It: Amazon

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20 John Carpenter Quotes About Horror Movies
Amy Sussman/Getty Images for Tribeca Film Festival
Amy Sussman/Getty Images for Tribeca Film Festival

Though he’s made a variety of movies—from fantasy to science fiction films—John Carpenter will forever be known as a master of horror, thanks in large part to the role he played in reinventing the genre with 1978’s Halloween. To celebrate the award-winning filmmaker’s 70th birthday, we’ve gathered up 20 of his most memorable quotes about Hollywood.

1. ON THE DEFINITION OF HORROR

“Horror is a reaction; it's not a genre.”

—From a 2015 interview with Interview Magazine

2. ON THE RULES OF MOVIEMAKING

“I think the rules of filmmaking are essentially the same as they were since, I guess, The Birth Of A Nation. The way you make movies: long shot, close-up, camera movement, structure—it’s all the same. Not much has changed. But the technology of movies has vastly changed. From 35mm black-and-white to color, from nitrate film to safety film and now into digital—and yet we’re still breaking scenes into master shots and close-ups. The cinema narrative has not changed that much since the silent film.”

—From a 2015 interview with The A.V. Club

3. ON THE TWO TYPES OF HORROR STORIES

“There are two different stories in horror: internal and external. In external horror films, the evil comes from the outside, the other tribe, this thing in the darkness that we don’t understand. Internal is the human heart.”

—From a 2011 interview with Vulture

4. ON THE IMPORTANCE OF NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD

“One movie that showed me it was possible to make a low-budget horror movie was Night of the Living Dead (1968). When I saw that, I was like, 'Wow, that's really effective, but it's obviously low budget.' They didn't have any money but they actually made something cool. That was inspirational to me when I was in film school.”

—From a 2015 interview with Interview Magazine

5. ON THE TRUTH ABOUT HOLLYWOOD

“Film buffs who don't live in Hollywood have a fantasy about what it's like to be a director. Movies and the people who make movies have such glamor associated with them. But the truth is, it's not like that. It's very different. It's hard work. If you were suddenly catapulted into that situation—without any training—you would say after it was over: 'Oh, God! You're kidding! You mean, this is what it's like? This is what they put you through?' Yes, as a matter of fact, it is like this—and it's often worse. People have tried to describe the film business, but it's impossible to describe because it's so crazy. You must know your craft inside out and then pick up the rules as you go along.”

—From an essay for Santa Fe Studios

6. ON THE HORROR OF WATCHING HIS OWN MOVIES

“I don't watch my films. I've seen 'em enough after cutting them and putting the music on. I don't ever want to see them again.”

—From a 2012 interview with Entertainment Weekly

7. ON THE EMOTIONAL TOLL MAKING MOVIES CAN TAKE ON A DIRECTOR

“I’ve been feeling old for years and years, and I think the movie business did it to me. At one point I just did movie after movie, and it starts tearing you down physically—emotionally too, if you do one after another. The stress, the emotional exertion of dealing with others. I’ve worked with really great actors and really difficult actors. The difficult ones are no fun. And the style of the movies today have changed a great deal. To me, I’m not a big fan of handheld. That’s just my tastes. That’s a quick fix for low budget. Let the operator direct it! Walk around. That’s how you burn through the pages. And found footage—how many times do we need to do that?”

—From a 2014 interview with Deadline

8. ON WHAT MAKES A GOOD HORROR FILM

“There’s a very specific secret: It should be scary.”

—From a 2015 interview with The A.V. Club

9. ON THE PERCEPTION OF A MOVIEMAKER

“In England, I'm a horror movie director. In Germany, I'm a filmmaker. In the U.S., I'm a bum.”

—From The Films of John Carpenter

10. ON STANDING OUT

“I don't want to be in the mainstream. I don't want to be a part of the demographics. I want to be an individual. I wear each of my films as a badge of pride. That's why I cherish all my bad reviews. If the critics start liking my movies, then I'm in deep trouble.”

—From an essay for Santa Fe Studios

11. ON MAINTAINING CONTROL

“My years in the business have taught me not to worry about what you can’t control.”

—From a 2007 interview with MovieMaker Magazine

12. ON HIS FAVORITE MOVIES

“I have two different categories of favorite films. One is the emotional favorites, which means these are generally films that I saw when I was a kid; anything you see in your formative years is more powerful, because it really stays with you forever. The second category is films that I saw while I was learning the craft of motion pictures.”

—From a 2011 interview with Rotten Tomatoes

13. ON BEING STUCK IN THE 1980S

“Well, They Live was a primal scream against Reaganism of the '80s. And the '80s never went away. They're still with us. That's what makes They Live look so fresh—it's a document of greed and insanity. It's about life in the United States then and now. If anything, things have gotten worse.”

—From a 2012 interview with Entertainment Weekly

14. ON THE IMPORTANCE OF INSTINCT

“I think every director depends primarily on his instincts. That’s what’s got him where he is, what’s going to carry him through the good times and the bad. I generally go with what I instinctually think I can do well.”

—From a 2011 interview with Vulture

15. ON BEING TYPECAST AS A DIRECTOR

“I haven't just made horror. I've made all sorts of movies. There have been fantasy movies, thrillers, horrors, science fiction. In terms of the ultimate reward, listen, man, when I was a kid, when I was 8 years old, I wanted to be a movie director, and I got to be a movie director. I lived my f*cking dream, you can't get better than that. That's the ultimate.”

—From a 2015 interview with Interview Magazine

16. ON THE REALITY OF MONSTERS

“Monsters in movies are us, always us, one way or the other. They’re us with hats on. The zombies in George Romero’s movies are us. They’re hungry. Monsters are us, the dangerous parts of us. The part that wants to destroy; the part of us with the reptile brain. The part of us that’s vicious and cruel. We express these in our stories as these monsters out there.”

—From a 2011 interview with the Buenos Aires Herald

17. ON MOVIES AS A SENSORY EXPERIENCE

“A movie’s not just the pictures. It’s the story and it’s the perspective and it’s the tempo and it’s the silence and it’s the music—it’s all the stuff that’s going on. All the sensory stuff. Sometimes you can get a lot of suspense going in a non-horror film. It all depends. But, look, if there was one secret way of doing a horror movie then everybody would be doing it.”

—From a 2015 interview with The A.V. Club

18. ON THE UNIVERSAL LANGUAGE OF HORROR

"Horror is a universal language; we're all afraid. We're born afraid, we're all afraid of things: death, disfigurement, loss of a loved one. Everything that I'm afraid of, you're afraid of and vice versa. So everybody feels fear and suspense. We were little kids once and so it's taking that basic human condition and emotion and just f*cking with it and playing with it. You can invent new horrors."

—From a 2015 interview with Interview Magazine

19. ON THE REMAKE TREND

“It’s a brand new world out there in terms of trying to get advertising. There’s so much going on that if you come up with a movie that people have never heard of they don’t pay attention to it—no matter how good it is. So it becomes, 'Let’s remake something that maybe rings a bell and that you’ve heard of before.' That way, you’re already ahead. I’m flattered, but I understand what’s going on. They’re picking everything to remake. I think they’ve just run down the list of other titles and have finally got to mine.”

—From a 2007 interview with MovieMaker Magazine

20. ON THE LASTING INFLUENCE OF HALLOWEEN

“I didn’t think there was any more story [to Halloween], and I didn’t want to do it again. All of my ideas were for the first Halloween—there shouldn’t have been any more! I’m flattered by the fact that people want to remake them, but they remake everything these days, so it doesn’t make me that special. But Michael Myers was an absence of character. And yet all the sequels are trying to explain that. That’s silliness—it just misses the whole point of the first movie, to me. He’s part person, part supernatural force. The sequels rooted around in motivation. I thought that was a mistake. However, I couldn’t stop them from making sequels. So my agents said, ‘Why don’t you become an executive producer and you can share the revenue?’ But I had to write the second movie, and every night I sat there and wrote with a six-pack of beer trying to get through this thing. And I didn’t do a very good job, but that was it. I couldn’t do any more."

—From a 2014 interview with Deadline

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