5 Bittersweet Lessons From Some Extra Sweet Cereals

Image credit: 
Ana Benaroya

Snap! Crackle! Flop!

1. Kream Krunch

Here’s the problem with cereal: it’s not ice cream. In 1965, Kellogg’s tried to sidestep this quandary by introducing Kream Krunch, a breakfast cereal filled with real bits of freeze-dried ice cream. For some reason, moms weren’t swayed by the word “nutritious” on the box, perhaps because it was overshadowed by the cereal’s mascot: an ice cream cone dressed as a soda jerk.

2. Cap'n Crunch's Airheads Berries

Cereal and taffy: together at last! Quaker teamed up with AirHeads candy in 2003 to produce fruity cereal “berries” in the candy’s flavors. As a Quaker employee said at the time, “Kids who love AirHeads candy and love Cap’n Crunch cereal are going to love this combination.” Proving once again that children make terrible chefs.

3. Cap'n Crunch's Ship Shake Liquid Cereal

In the late 1960s, fearing that the spoon was becoming obsolete, the Cap’n introduced a powdered “liquid cereal” drink mix. Marketers thought the chocolate, chocolate malt, and butterscotch flavors would have it flying off the shelf. Instead the idea sank to the breakfast version of Davy Jones’ Locker.

4. Urkel-O's

Every wacky neighbor needs an equally wacky brand extension. In 1991, Steve Urkel—the nerd next door from Family Matters—got his own cereal: boxes of strawberry and banana flavored loops. Somewhere, Eddie Haskell, Mr. Furley, and Kimmy Gibbler are fuming.

5. Nerds Cereal

You can’t just pour milk on Nerds candy and call it breakfast, so this mid-1980s gem was the next best thing. Just like the candy, each box featured two separate compartments with their own “tiny, tangy” flavors. Parents griped that the contents smelled like Kool-Aid, which makes us wonder: Why doesn’t Kool-Aid have a cereal?

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April 22, 2014 - 8:00am
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