5 Fascinating Facts About Middle Children

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The perpetually neglected Stephanie Tanner, the embittered Jan Brady, the overworked and underappreciated Michael Bluth: For many people, these are the images that pop into their heads when thinking of the stereotypical middle child. In TV and movies, they’re often used as comic relief, always stuck in the shadow of their other, seemingly more important siblings.

But the reality is far more generous to middle children. Studies have shown them to be exceedingly independent and creative, with certain leadership qualities that their firstborn and last-born counterparts can’t match. Some of our most important world leaders, artists, musicians, and entrepreneurs occupy this oft-mocked middle spot, but from most accounts, it’s a breeding ground for success. Here are five fascinating facts about middle children.

1. THEY MAY BE ENDANGERED.

There was a time during the first half of the 20th century when having three to four children was seen as the ideal number for parents, with 35 percent of moms between 40 and 44 having four children or more. Those numbers have been reversing since 1971—and now, two children is the current preferred number for 48 percent of Americans, according to the Pew Research Center. On top of that, only 12 percent of women in their early forties have four children or more.

More people are going to college, taking longer to become financially settled, have easier access to birth control, and are embarking on demanding careers that put family life on the back burner. In addition to having children later in life, the average cost of raising a child has increased dramatically over the generations, so one or two might be all some couples can afford. These factors all add up to create smaller families, which means we’ll likely see fewer middle children throughout the country in future decades if these trends continue. And without them, we’ll lose out on all of the remarkable traits seen below.

2. THEY COULD BE TOP-NOTCH NEGOTIATORS.

Despite the common perception of middle children being resentful of their siblings and never getting enough attention from their parents, Katrin Schumann, co-author of The Secret Power of Middle Children, has done extensive research on the subject that found the plight of middle children may actually be a positive thing later in life. One such trait is their ability to negotiate.

“Middles are used to not getting their own way, and so they become savvy, skillful manipulators,” Schumann told Psychology Today. “They can see all sides of a question and are empathetic and judge reactions well. They are more willing to compromise, and so they can argue successfully. Since they often have to wait around as kids, they’re more patient.”

3. THEIR LOWER SELF-ESTEEM MIGHT NOT BE A BAD THING.

Yes, the middle child may suffer from low self-esteem when compared to their siblings, due to their “their lack of uniqueness and attention at home,” according to Schumann. However, this doesn’t have to be a negative thing as it helps keep their ego in check.

“Also, self-esteem is not as critical as our society believes,” Schumann explained. “Having an accurate sense of your self-esteem is more important than having high self-esteem. Surprisingly, new studies show that high self-esteem does not correlate with better grades in school or greater success in life. It can actually lead to a lack of perseverance in the face of difficulties.”

4. THEY’RE THE MOST FAITHFUL IN RELATIONSHIPS.

Dr. Catherine Salmon, Schumann's co-author on The Secret Power of Middle Children, found that 80 percent of middle children claimed they have never cheated on their partner. This is compared to 65 percent of firstborns and 53 percent of last-borns who said they were never unfaithful to their long-term partner or spouse. This, of course, led to separate studies confirming that middle children, and their spouses, were happiest in marriage when compared to other birth orders.

There is a catch, though. Schumann said that while middle children may be the happiest and make for satisfied partners, they might not work well together: "An Israeli marital happiness survey shows that middles are the happiest and most satisfied in relationships, and that they partner well with firsts or lasts—but less well with other middles, because they may both avoid conflict."

5. THERE IS A LINEAGE OF LEADERS AS MIDDLE CHILDREN.

Though the conventional numbers have established that most U.S. presidents are firstborns, Schumann contends that half of our Commanders-in-Chief are actually middle children. In an interview with NPR, she revealed that the connection between the presidency and middle children was obscured for years because of one strange quirk: firstborn girls weren’t traditionally counted as older siblings. Instead, firstborns were only taken into consideration when it came to males.

In general, it's difficult to nail down certain presidential birth orders, as the middle child blog SmackDab puts it: "George Washington’s father had four children with his first wife before the first President was born. Washington was the first of six children from his father’s second marriage. So was he the first born or the fifth born?" Still, if we're to take conventional wisdom and a loose definition of what a middle child is (basically anyone not the oldest or the youngest), then it turns out that 52 percent of presidents were born in the middle, including Thomas Jefferson, Teddy Roosevelt, John F. Kennedy, and Abraham Lincoln.

It's JFK in particular, Schumann concluded, who displayed many of the traits typical of a middle child during his years in office, citing his ability to communicate and negotiate even under the most stressful of conditions.

11 Facts About Eleanor of Aquitaine

A drawing of what Eleanor of Aquitaine might have looked like circa 1150
A drawing of what Eleanor of Aquitaine might have looked like circa 1150
Hulton Archive/Getty Images

Eleanor of Aquitaine was among the most powerful women of the 12th century. She controlled an extensive estate, became Queen of France and then England, and gave birth to one of England's most famed rulers, Richard the Lionheart. While her biography is now tangled up with myths and legends—even her date and place of birth are difficult to pin down—much of her legacy and influence survives. Here are 11 facts about Eleanor of Aquitaine.

1. Young Eleanor of Aquitaine was Europe’s most eligible bachelorette.

Born around 1122 or 1124 possibly in today’s southern France, Eleanor was named for her mother, the Duchess Aénor de Châtellerault. She was the eldest of three children. Her father—William X, Duke of Aquitaine and Count of Poitou—presided over one of the biggest holdings of land in France. It’s thought that from an early age she was educated in Latin, philosophy, and horseback riding. And when her younger brother died in 1130, Eleanor became the heir to a formidable amount of land and power.

When William X died in 1137 while on a pilgrimage to Santiago de Compostela in Spain, the teenaged Eleanor suddenly became the Duchess of Aquitaine, a woman of major wealth—and a very eligible match. There was little time for her to mourn. As soon as news of her father’s death reached France, her marriage to Louis VII, son of the King of France, was arranged. The king dispatched 500 men to transport Eleanor to Paris for the wedding. Not long after their summer ceremony, the king fell ill and then died. By the end of the year his son was on the throne, and Eleanor was crowned Queen of France.

2. Her beauty was celebrated, but her appearance is a mystery.

It’s not hard to find contemporary accounts of Eleanor’s good looks. The French medieval poet Bernard de Ventadour declared her "gracious, lovely, the embodiment of charm," while Matthew Paris remarked on her "admirable beauty." Curiously, though, in all these celebrations of her fine features, not one person wrote down what she actually looked like. Her hair color, eye color, height, and face all remain a mystery. No art that has been definitively linked to her survives other than the effigy on her tomb—and the degree to which that resembles Eleanor's looks is unclear.

3. She didn't stay home during the Crusades.

When Louis VII answered the pope’s call for a Second Crusade to defend Jerusalem against the Muslims, Eleanor did not stay behind in France. Between 1147 and 1149, she traveled with her husband's party to Constantinople and then Jerusalem. (According to legend, she took along 300 ladies-in-waiting dressed as Amazons—but those tales have been debunked.)

Unfortunately, this was no romantic adventure for the royal couple. Louis and his headstrong queen were mismatched, and the strain between them culminated at the court of her uncle, Raymond of Poitiers at Antioch. Rumors of an incestuous infidelity between Eleanor of Aquitaine and her uncle, whose luxurious court thrilled her with its charms, darkened her reputation. She also made waves with her defiant support of her uncle’s plans for the crusade; he advised attacking Aleppo, while Louis preferred to continue to Jerusalem. Soon, Louis would force Eleanor to continue with him.

Ultimately, the Second Crusade was a debacle, culminating with the disastrous Siege of Damascus in 1148, which ended in a Muslim victory. Louis VII and the crusader army were sent home packing.

4. Her first marriage was annulled.

The royal marriage didn’t last much longer, its tensions furthered by the fact that Eleanor had yet to give birth to a male heir. The marriage was finally annulled in 1152. (The pair were granted the annulment on the grounds of consanguinity—the fact that they were technically related.) Eleanor kept her lands and was single again, but not for long. In May of that same year, she married Henry Plantagenet, Count of Anjou and Duke of Normandy. Two years later they were crowned the King and Queen of England.

5. She was a powerful Queen of England.

Eleanor was no less strong-willed as the Queen of England than she had been as the Queen of France. She refused to stay home and idle away her hours. She traveled extensively to protect the kingdom that was then being consolidated by Henry, giving the monarchy a presence across its newly united cultures. When her husband was away, she helped direct government and ecclesiastical affairs. And in contrast to her listless marriage to Louis VII—with whom she had two daughters—she secured her position by having eight children, including five sons and three daughters.

6. She had a historically bad break-up.

However, relations between Eleanor and Henry soured after years of his open adultery and frequent absences. They separated in 1167, and she moved to her lands in Poitiers. The distance didn’t change her opinion of Henry; when their sons revolted against him in 1173, she didn't waver in choosing sides, backing her children over her husband. When the revolt failed, it had catastrophic consequences for her freedom, with Henry making her his prisoner.

7. She spent over a decade under house arrest.

After supporting her sons in their revolt, Eleanor was captured while attempting to find safety in France. She spent between 15 and 16 years under house arrest in various English castles, and was almost entirely absent from the country's activity (although there were rumors that she had a hand in the death of Rosamund, King Henry's beloved mistress). On special occasions like Christmas, Henry would allow her to show her face, but otherwise she was kept invisible and powerless. Only in 1189, when Henry died, was she fully freed.

8. She was most powerful as a widow.

Her son Richard, who became king following Henry's death, was the one who freed his mother. After her years of house arrest, she did not come out ready for retirement. Instead, she threw herself into preparing for the coronation of her son, who would be known as Richard the Lionheart. Before he was crowned King of England, she journeyed all over his future kingdom to forge alliances and foster goodwill. When Richard set out on the Third Crusade, Eleanor took charge as regent, fending off her power-hungry son John. She even paid Richard's ransom when he was imprisoned by the duke of Austria and the Holy Roman Emperor, traveling there herself to bring him home to England.

Richard then died in 1199, leaving John to become king. Eleanor, then in her seventies, kept at her commitment to the kingdom’s stability, including going to Spain to arrange a pivotal marriage for her granddaughter Blanche of Castile to the heir to the French throne. She also gave John crucial support against a rebellion led by her grandson Arthur.

9. A vase she owned still survives.

A vase that once belonged to Eleanor of Aquitaine
A vase that once belonged to Eleanor of Aquitaine
tnchanse ~ Tom Hansen, Flickr // CC BY-NC-SA 2.0 (cropped)

Out of all the tokens of wealth and royalty that touched her life, only one artifact that once belonged to Eleanor of Aquitaine survives. She received an elegant rock crystal vessel from her grandfather William IX Duke of Aquitaine, who had likely been given it by the ruler of Imad al-dawla of Saragossa. In 1137, she gave it as a wedding gift to her future husband, Louis VII. The king’s advisor Abbot Suger of Saint-Denis then convinced Louis VII to add it to his abbey’s treasury (thus keeping it in French royal possession after their brief marriage). Now visitors to the Louvre in Paris can view the rare object, where, despite its series of owners, it’s still known as the “Eleanor” vase.

10. She has an extensive legacy in pop culture.

Eleanor of Aquitaine has hardly faded from the public eye. Alternately depicted as a temptress, warrior, protective mother, and powerful queen, interpretations of Eleanor reflect how her history has been retold over time. In Shakespeare's 16th-century The Life and Death of King John, she is an aged but sharp and sometimes sultry force. She recurs in screen versions of Robin Hood (2010) and the Ivanhoe series. Katharine Hepburn bristled with fiery energy in the role of Eleanor in the 1968 film The Lion in Winter, based on the play by James Goldman. She even has a seat at a major work of feminist art—there's a place set for her in Judy Chicago's The Dinner Party, now at the Brooklyn Museum.

11. Her bones are gone, but her tomb survives.

Tombs of Eleanor of Aquitaine and Henry II of England in the church at Fontevraud Abbey
Tombs of Eleanor of Aquitaine and Henry II of England in the church at Fontevraud Abbey
Martin Cooper, Flickr // CC BY-2.0 (cropped)

Having outlived all of her husbands and most of her children, Eleanor ended her days at Fontevraud Abbey in France. She died there in 1204 in her eighties. Remarkably, her 13th-century effigy tomb survives, depicting Eleanor reclining on a bed, a crown upon her head and a devotional book in her hands. She seems to be studiously ignoring the effigies of her husband Henry II and son Richard the Lionheart on either side of her.

Her bones were once interred in the abbey's crypt. But like many of the country’s churches during the French Revolution, the abbey was deconsecrated. The crypt's bones were exhumed, dispersed, and never recovered.

11 Gifts for the Hygge Enthusiast

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iStock

Hygge is still having a moment. In October 2017, the Danish term—which is used to convey a kind of warm coziness, and has no English equivalent—was one of Dictionary.com’s top 10 most searched words. But it’s a lifestyle that’s best understood when experienced firsthand. To help that special peace-seeking someone in your life find the ultimate level of relaxation, might we suggest one of these goodies?

1. The Little Book Of Hygge: Danish Secrets T0 Happy Living

The first rule of hygge is to learn everything you can about hygge—like how it’s pronounced for starters (it’s hoo-ga). That’s just one of the gems serenity-seekers will find in The Little Book of Hygge: Danish Secrets to Happy Living, which offers a history of the philosophy and tons of tips for how to easily integrate the concept into your life. Plus, it’s written by Meik Wiking, CEO of Copenhagen’s Happiness Research Institute, so a brighter mood is practically guaranteed.

Find It at Amazon for $14 and also at these other retailers:

2. Electric Fireplace

wall-mounted fireplace
Amazon

Whether reading a book or chatting with friends, there are few snugger places to do so in the wintertime than in front of a flickering fireplace. But if your giftee isn't lucky enough to have a home with a fireplace, there’s a simple workaround: They can mount an electric one to the wall, just as they would a plasma TV. They’re sleek, smokeless, and add instant ambiance.

Find It at Amazon for $250.

3. French Vanilla Yankee Candle

A fireplace isn’t the only thing that flickers in a hygge-happy home: Candles are a simple way to dazzle the eyes and indulge olfactory senses. While a handful of tea lights are a quick and inexpensive way to create the effect, a richly scented candle—in a natural flavor like vanilla or cinnamon stick—can take anyone's cozy quarters to the next level.

Find It at these retailers:

4. EDDIE BAUER QUEST FLEECE THROW; $55

With or without a fire to keep them warm, your loved one is also going to want a blanket—and a soft and cozy one at that. Eddie Bauer’s fleece blanket is lightweight, so easy to carry from room to room or on the go. And its bold buffalo check style screams comfort.

Find It at Amazon for $36.

5. Faux Fur Blanket

If your giftee is partial to more natural design schemes and materials, a faux fur blanket is the perfect way to bring a bit of the outdoors inside—and keep extra warm all at once. West Elm carries a full line of different styles and colors to satisfy even the pickiest faux fur-lover.

Find It at West Elm for $50 and up.

6. Acorn Slipper Sock

Slippers or socks? The ACORN Slipper Sock offers the best of both worlds. It’s essentially a big, warm, woolly sock with serious traction. Perfect for both lounging on the couch and padding into the kitchen to get a refill on that hot chocolate.

Find It at Amazon for $30 and up and also at these other retailers:

7. Glerups Open Heel Slippers

If your favorite hygge enthusiast's quiet contemplation tends to attract a few interruptions—like taking the dog for a walk—these rubber-soled Glerups slippers are tough enough to handle the outside elements, while keeping feet warm.

Find It at Amazon for $130 and up.

8. WISSOTZKY Tea Magic Tea Chest

A hot cup of something is an essential part of any hygge environment. While coffee and cocoa are all well and good (and delicious), a cup of tea can offer additional healing properties. To find out just what kind of tea fits your giftee's personality best, why not allow them to sample as many as they can with this giant box of black, green, fruit, and herbal teas.

Find It at Amazon for $35.

9. Mountain Hardwear PackDown Vest

When your loved one does have to head outdoors, there’s no reason they can’t keep that cozy vibe going—especially when wrapped up in a down vest.

Find It at Amazon for $105 and up and also at these other retailers:

10. Wool Irish Springweight Aran Sweater

Whether they’re taking a walk in the snow or hunkered down with a book, nothing says cold-weather comfort like a soon-to-be-favorite sweater. This Irish knit sweater, made by West End Knitwear, comes in a variety of sizes and colors and is unisex, so perfect for sharing.

Find It at Amazon for $60 and up.

11. WEMO Insight Smart Plug

Though smart technology might seem to fly in the face of everything that hygge stands for, the environment that one surrounds oneself with—from the temperature to the lighting—is all a key part of creating the perfect setting. This smart plug from Wemo, which works with both Amazon Alexa and Google Assistant, allows the user to control those things right from a smartphone—no climbing out from under the blanket required.

Find It at Amazon for $33 and also at these other retailers:

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