The Weird Week in Review

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Jennifer Lapier

A Visit to the Collision Repair Shop

Jennifer Lapier of Colleyville, Texas, was contacted by police New Year's night and was told that someone had entered her business, Lone Star Collision Repair. That someone was driving a GMC Yukon. The SUV had crashed into a sedan and then into the building, right under the sign.

A grandfather who was driving the sedan that was hit was transported to a local hospital with non-life threatening injuries along with his granddaughter, who was in the passenger seat.

"Had somebody been in the backseat, they would not have survived," said Captain Robert Hinton with the Colleyville Police. "There was very little left of the car."

The shop was open the next day, and Lapier said no cars were damaged, but the storage room has a big hole in the wall. The unnamed driver of the SUV was taken into custody. Police believed that alcohol may have been a factor.

Thai Woman Found in Suitcase at Mexican Border

U.S. Customs and Border Protection officials stopped a 56-year-old Phoenix man as he re-entered the U.S. from Mexico at Nogales, and his vehicle was selected for further inspection. When officers opened a large suitcase he had in the back of the SUV, they found a woman curled up inside! The woman, identified as Thai national Pornkamol Mongkolsermsak, had been deported from the U.S. only ten days before. The unnamed man's vehicle was confiscated.

Dogs Are Terrible Drivers

Tabitha Ormaechea of Spokane, Washington, was driving home when another car hit hers. She looked, but could find no driver, save for a small chihuahua in the driver's seat. The car's owner, Jason Martinez, had left the dog in the car while he went into a store. The chihuahua, named Toby, somehow knocked the car out of gear. It then rolled out of the parking lot and into the street, where it collided with Ormaechea's vehicle. No one was injured.

Pastafarian Councilman Sworn in Wearing Colander

Christopher Schaeffer was sworn in as a member of the town council in Pomfret, New York, last week while wearing a colander on his head.

Schaeffer wore a colander (a strainer typically used to drain water from spaghetti) while Town Clerk Allison Dispense administered the oath of office to him before the board's reorganizational meeting. When the OBSERVER asked afterward why he wore a colander on his head, Schaeffer said he was a minister with an even more unique organization - the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

"It's just a statement about religious freedom," he said. "It's a religion without any dogma."

While Pastafarians have fought for the right to wear colanders in their driver's license photographs, this is the first instance of an elected official wearing one to be sworn into office.

Shoplifter Leads Police on Chase Behind Motorized Shopping Cart

Police in Warrenton, Oregon, arrested 59-year-old Laurie Ruth Chester on charges of theft and disorderly conduct. The incident began when an employee of a Subway shop called to report a woman stealing $13 from a tip jar. Theft calls about a woman with a similar description then came in from Fred Meyer, Rite Aid, and Home Depot. At Home Depot, Chester was seen using a motorized shopping cart to take a basket full of merchandise out of the store. She drove the shopping cart out onto the road, where police found her. Police Chief Mathew Workman said that Chester has a record of bizarre behavior in other precincts.

Firefighter Puts Out Fire with Beer

An off-duty Houston firefighter stopped to help a truck driver on the shoulder of Texas 71. Capt. Craig Moreau saw smoke coming from the brakes of an 18-wheeler. He crawled underneath the truck and tried to put out the flame with a fire extinguisher, but it kept flaring back up. Then the two men tried another tactic. The truck was hauling beer, so they shook can after can of beer to spray on the fire. The tire exploded, but they eventually got the blaze put out. Strangely, the driver had just had the brakes repaired. The local fire chief praised Moreau and the driver for their resourcefulness.

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January 10, 2014 - 12:40pm
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