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Sarah Turbin

26 Punny Halloween Costume Ideas From a Pun Champion

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Sarah Turbin

Feeling creatively bankrupt this Halloween? Can’t stand the idea of donning another generic witch cap, ghost sheet, or sexy pizza rat costume? You’ve come to the right place.

If you, like me, have been accused of suffering from witzelsucht, or any other such judgment leveled against your innocent penchant for puns, then let it be known: Halloween is the costumed arena where we shall have our revenge. What follows below is a list of pun-based costumes for Halloween, each of which assuredly consists of a very long walk to a very short punchline. Let the groans begin.

A woman dressed in green wearing leaves and a shirt with prime numbers on it.
Sarah Turbin

1. Dress as a Jungle goddess and cover yourself in numbers that can’t be divided. You’re Amazon Prime.

2. Dress as a many-pronged garden tool and rap all night. You’re d’rake.

3. Dress as a zombie boxer and say you’re there to kill a doppelganger. You’re a dead ringer.

4. If you’re just single and looking for love, put on a coal worker’s hat and a headlight. You can flirt by saying you’re an unaccompanied miner.

5. Dress as a bloodsucking bug and act jittery all night. You’re just a nervous tick.

A woman wearing an outlet costume with doodles on it.
Sarah Turbin

6. Create an electrical socket out of cardboard and then doodle, collage and scrapbook all over it. You’re a creative outlet.

7. Dress as a jar of Jif peanut butter and cover yourself in gold flowers. When people ask, say you’re Jif Gold-bloom.

8. Attach half of a window to your butt. Say you’re a pane in the ass.

9. Dress as a sea cow in every color of the rainbow. Introduce yourself as all of hue-manatee.

10. Put a muzzle on your face and create a podium out of cardboard. You’re a Hannibal lectern.

A woman wrapped in plastic wrap holding cards.
Sarah Turbin

11. Cover yourself in parchment or wrapping paper and draw dice and question marks all over it. Voilà! Chance the Wrapper.

12. Cover yourself in gold body paint and carry around a saxophone. You’re Goldman Sax. (Bonus points if you can actually play "Careless Whisper.")

13. Wear a sign that says Route 666. When people point out the extra 6 as a mistake, correct them by saying “No, I’m the Route of All Evil.”

14. Get together a group of 12 of your single friends and just say you’re the “bae-cursed dozen.”

15. Get a bunch of girlfriends together to dress in formalwear and fine jewelry, then add bucket hats and fishing poles. Fight all night. When people ask, say you’re the Reel Housewives (of whatever city).

A woman in pink overalls, carrying a whip, wearing a hat and a nametag that says "Anna Jones."
Sarah Turbin

16. Dress like a hipster, introduce yourself as Anna Jones and carry a whip. You’re Indie Anna Jones.

17. Don a nun costume and a silver medal. You’re Second to Nun.

18. Wear all orange, get a spray-tan, and put on a sailor’s hat. You’re a sun-kissed naval orange.

19. Dress as Elmer Fudd and get very very slightly angry at everything. You’re minimum wage.

20. Cover yourself with legal jargon and speak Italian. Tell people you’ve got laws-on-ya.

A man in a suit and top hat holding a steak.
Sarah Turbin

21. Wear a business suit and carry around a hunk of meat. You’re an important steak-holder.

22. For a group of tech junkies: Dress as wild cats and act crazy all night. You can’t help it; you’re just hyper-lynx.

23. Dress as a tube of Colgate Total and photo-bomb people’s pictures all night by standing directly in front of them. You’re the Total Eclipse.

24. Wear a Red Cross on your chest, a leather jacket and sunglasses. You’re the cool aid man.

25. Dress as a kid and cover yourself in flour. Sing peace songs all night—you’re a flour child.

A man wearing bear ears.
Sarah Turbin

26. Lazy? Just put on bear ears. Say you’re doing the bear minimum.

Sam Corbin is a writer and performer based in Brooklyn. Her puns have been featured in The New Yorker, InStyle Magazine, Bust Magazine, Gothamist, and Huffington Post. Sam is also a multi-time champion of the Punderdome, a monthly pun tournament in Brooklyn, New York. She currently works at BuzzFeed. Twitter: @ahoysamantha.

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fun
Here's How to Turn an IKEA Box Into a Spaceship
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iStock

Since IKEA boxes are designed to contain entire furniture items, they could probably fit a small child once they’re emptied of any flat-packed component pieces. This means they have great potential as makeshift forts—or even as play spaceships, according to one of the Swedish furniture brand’s print ads, which was spotted by Design Taxi.

First highlighted by Ads of the World, the advertisement—which was created by Miami Ad School, New York—shows that IKEA is helping customers transform used boxes into build-it-yourself “SPÄCE SHIPS” for children. The company provides play kits, which come with both an instruction manual and cardboard "tools" for tiny builders to wield during the construction process.

As for the furniture boxes themselves, they're emblazoned with the words “You see a box, they see a spaceship." As if you won't be climbing into the completed product along with the kids …

Check out the ad below:

[h/t Design Taxi]

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Food
The Best Cupcake in All 50 States
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We’re going to sugarcoat it. Twelve years after the advent of the cupcake-only bakery (the California-launched chain Sprinkles is credited with opening the first in 2005), there are a lot of options. We rounded up 50 of the best decadent desserts across the country. So go out, have your (cup)cake—and eat it, too.

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