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14 Creative Divorce Cakes

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We've discussed geeky wedding invitations, wedding dresses, and wedding photos. But with so many marriages not lasting forever, the market for "divorce cakes" is alive and well.

1. Don’t Slip, Dear

This cake, by Artisan Cake Company, so closely reflects a traditional wedding cake, only it is in black and the groom seems to have had an “accident.”

2. The Tumbling Bride

It’s not just the ladies wishing ill on their exes. Here’s the gender-swapped version of the scenario in the last cake, featuring a “Congratulations on your Divorce” banner. This creation is by Flickr user doroc.

3. Sinking in Vegas

For those who barely escaped the choppy waves of a wedding officiated by Elvis, this cake by Flickr user TheTopping is a perfect choice.

4. A Steampunk Celebration

There are plenty of steampunk wedding cakes out there, so it’s only logical that at least a few divorce cakes are adorned in this highly stylized manner. This particular design by Cakes by No More Tiers even has a fun steampunk-esque message, “Time’s up…. full steam ahead.”

5. Back Stabbing

What do you do when someone has broken your heart? If your answer is “cut theirs out,” then you might want to ask Pink Rose Cakes to recreate this lovely design for you if you ever get a divorce.

6. Burning Witch

This design by Alliance Bakery is quite possibly the most suiting creation ever for all the gents who refer to their ex as a “serious witch.”

7. Ding Dong the Psycho is Gone

Here’s another play on the “witch” title, although this one, by Gigi’s Cake Boutique, seems strikingly more cheerful.

8. Skinned Alive

While many divorce cakes are dark, this one, by Aurora Cakes, is the most diabolical I’ve seen yet.

9. The Relationship Cemetery

If your love is completely dead, maybe it’s time you hold a funeral for it. If you’re wondering where to get a perfect mini-cemetery like this one, well, you’d better head over to Elite Cake Creations.

10. Wonder Woman at a Funeral

On this cake by Cakes by Brown Suga’, Wonder Woman is casually pondering the wonderful things the future now holds.

11. Taking the Garbage Out

The groom is thrown out with the garbage in this cake by Elite Cake Creations, the same company that made the wedding ring cemetery above.

12. What Was Yours Is Mine

If you’re the type to gloat over what you got in a divorce, then this cake by ABC Cake Shop and Bakery is perfect for your Divorce Day.

13. His and Not His

Here’s another one where the wife was more than happy to show off her newly acquired assets, this time by Shyndigz Catering. At least the husband got to keep his pizza shop.

14. Made from Divorce Papers

While all the other cakes on this list are actually edible, this one is just an art piece. Even so, Kate Thomas’ idea to use her actual divorce papers to create a paper cake sculpture was certainly a creative way to immortalize the event.
* * *
Has anyone ever eaten any divorce cake?

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Food
Let Alexa Help You Brine a Turkey This Thanksgiving
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iStock

There’s a reason most of us only cook turkey once a year: The bird is notoriously easy to overcook. You could rely on gravy and cranberry sauce to salvage your dried-out turkey this Thanksgiving, or you could follow cooking advice from the experts.

Brining a turkey is the best way to guarantee it retains its moisture after hours in the oven. The process is also time-consuming, so do yourself a favor this year and let Alexa be your sous chef.

“Morton Brine Time” is a new skill from the cloud-based home assistant. If you own an Amazon Echo you can download it for free by going online or by asking Alexa to enable it. Once it’s set up, start asking Alexa for brining tips and step-by-step recipes customized to the size of your turkey. Two recipes were developed by Richard Blais, the celebrity chef and restaurateur best known for his Top Chef win and Food Network appearances.

Whether you go for a wet brine (soaking your turkey in water, salt, sugar, and spices) or a dry one (just salt and spices), the process isn’t as intimidating as it sounds. And the knowledge that your bird will come out succulent and juicy will definitely take some stress out of the holiday.

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Big Questions
Why Do the Lions and Cowboys Always Play on Thanksgiving?
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Rey Del Rio/Getty Images

Because it's tradition! But how did this tradition begin?

Every year since 1934, the Detroit Lions have taken the field for a Thanksgiving game, no matter how bad their record has been. It all goes back to when the Lions were still a fairly young franchise. The team started in 1929 in Portsmouth, Ohio, as the Spartans. Portsmouth, while surely a lovely town, wasn't quite big enough to support a pro team in the young NFL. Detroit radio station owner George A. Richards bought the Spartans and moved the team to Detroit in 1934.

Although Richards's new squad was a solid team, they were playing second fiddle in Detroit to the Hank Greenberg-led Tigers, who had gone 101-53 to win the 1934 American League Pennant. In the early weeks of the 1934 season, the biggest crowd the Lions could draw for a game was a relatively paltry 15,000. Desperate for a marketing trick to get Detroit excited about its fledgling football franchise, Richards hit on the idea of playing a game on Thanksgiving. Since Richards's WJR was one of the bigger radio stations in the country, he had considerable clout with his network and convinced NBC to broadcast a Thanksgiving game on 94 stations nationwide.

The move worked brilliantly. The undefeated Chicago Bears rolled into town as defending NFL champions, and since the Lions had only one loss, the winner of the first Thanksgiving game would take the NFL's Western Division. The Lions not only sold out their 26,000-seat stadium, they also had to turn fans away at the gate. Even though the juggernaut Bears won that game, the tradition took hold, and the Lions have been playing on Thanksgiving ever since.

This year, the Lions host the Minnesota Vikings.

HOW 'BOUT THEM COWBOYS?


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The Cowboys, too, jumped on the opportunity to play on Thanksgiving as an extra little bump for their popularity. When the chance to take the field on Thanksgiving arose in 1966, it might not have been a huge benefit for the Cowboys. Sure, the Lions had filled their stadium for their Thanksgiving games, but that was no assurance that Texans would warm to holiday football so quickly.

Cowboys general manager Tex Schramm, though, was something of a marketing genius; among his other achievements was the creation of the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders.

Schramm saw the Thanksgiving Day game as a great way to get the team some national publicity even as it struggled under young head coach Tom Landry. Schramm signed the Cowboys up for the game even though the NFL was worried that the fans might just not show up—the league guaranteed the team a certain gate revenue in case nobody bought tickets. But the fans showed up in droves, and the team broke its attendance record as 80,259 crammed into the Cotton Bowl. The Cowboys beat the Cleveland Browns 26-14 that day, and a second Thanksgiving pigskin tradition caught hold. Since 1966, the Cowboys have missed having Thanksgiving games only twice.

Dallas will take on the Los Angeles Chargers on Thursday.

WHAT'S WITH THE NIGHT GAME?


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In 2006, because 6-plus hours of holiday football was not sufficient, the NFL added a third game to the Thanksgiving lineup. This game is not assigned to a specific franchise—this year, the Washington Redskins will welcome the New York Giants.

Re-running this 2008 article a few days before the games is our Thanksgiving tradition.

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