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8 Children's Book Themes Dr. Seuss Never Tackled

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Everyone reads Dr. Seuss, Judy Blume, Shel Silverstein and Maurice Sendak books growing up, but there are thousands more children’s authors out there. With so much competition, some authors choose to cover unique subjects in an attempt to stand out from the crowd.

1. The Illicit Drug Trade

Do your kids need to know more about the drug industry? Well then, The House That Crack Built might be just right for educating them about everything from the workers struggling in Colombian fields to drug dealers to homeless crackheads. While the book intends to show the evils of the drug trade, it also does a great job at showing that becoming a drug kingpin can get you one heck of a house.

2. Weed

Maybe you’re a 420-friendly kind of parent who doesn’t want your child to think all illegal substances are evil. Well, in that case, you’d better grab a copy of It’s Just a Plant as soon as possible. This title, written for children aged 3-5, tells the story of a young girl who walks in on her parents smoking marijuana and then is educated about the plant and why adults sometimes use it, but children never should. This might cause some confusion when the D.A.R.E. program starts up at their school.

3. In-Utero Boredom

Most children’s books are oriented towards kids that have already been born, but Ma! There’s Nothing to Do Here! tells the story of a bored little fetus awaiting the big day when it can finally come out and see the world.

4. Fertilization

There are differing opinions on when you should introduce your kids to the birds and the bees, but for those who want to teach 4-7-year-olds about the subject, Where Willy Went is a good way to start. The book stars Willy the sperm and his nemesis Butch who compete in the swimming race every day until Willy finally makes his way into the big prize, the egg inside Mrs. Browne. Eventually, the egg becomes a baby girl, but no one knows where Willy disappeared to, until baby Edna starts showing off the same traits as the little winning sperm.

While the book won’t answer all of a kid’s questions about baby-making, it certainly makes the story of fertilization fun.

5. Constipation

If given the chance, most kids would survive on a diet of ice cream and candy. While this might be a delicious way to live, we all know that it’s not healthy, and it would wreak havoc on someone’s digestive system. Fortunately, It Hurts When I Poop is there to teach children why their diet can make it easier or harder to go potty and why they shouldn’t hold in their poops too long.

6. Flatulence

Ever since Everyone Poops became a breakout success, children’s authors have become obsessed with talking about things that come out of our backsides. This specific title was actually created by the same author as a follow up to Everyone Poops, offering to explain where gas comes from and why it stinks.

7. Urinals

This book is specifically oriented to children living in Brussels, as the plot revolves around the famous bronze statue of the little peeing boy. When a toddler sees the statue, he is inspired to start standing while urinating. While his first few attempts fail, he is soon peeing on trees, snails and more, finally standing beside his father at a urinal.

8. Conjoined Twins

Actually, Seuss did include conjoined twins in his 1953 musical The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T, but this book includes a short history of famous conjoined twins and talks about the medical causes of the condition. It's more about accepting other people regardless of their differences. The author goes into detail about how Siamese twins are different from most people, but also makes sure to focus on how, in many ways, they are like everyone else.
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Have any of you ever bought one of these books for your youngster? Or, do you guys have any titles to add to the list?

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crime
German Police Tried to Fine Someone $1000 for Farting at Them
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Thomas Lohnes/Getty Images for IMG

In Berlin, passing gas can cost you. Quite a lot, actually, in the case of a man accused of disrespecting police officers by releasing a pair of noxious farts while being detained by the police. As CityLab reports, Berlin’s police force has recently been rocked by a scandal hinging on the two farts of one man who was asked to show his ID to police officers while partying on an evening in February 2016.

The man in question was accused of disrespecting the officers involved by aiming his flatulence at a policewoman, and was eventually slapped with a fine of 900 euros ($1066) in what local media called the "Irrer-Pups Prozess," or "Crazy Toot Trial." The errant farter was compelled to show up for court in September after refusing to pay the fine. A judge dismissed the case in less than 10 minutes.

But the smelly situation sparked a political scandal over the police resources wasted over the non-crime. It involved 18 months, 23 public officials, and 17 hours of official time—on the taxpayers’ dime. Officials estimate that those two minor toots cost taxpayers more than $100, which is chump change in terms of city budgets, but could have been used to deal with more pressing criminal issues.

[h/t CityLab]

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History
In 1909, a Door-to-Door Catnip Salesman Incited a Riot in New York
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In 1909, New York City businessman G. Herman Gottlieb was looking for a way to make a quick buck. He found it in a wooded section of Northern Manhattan, where wild catnip grew. After harvesting two baskets full of the plant, Gottlieb headed downtown to Harlem, intending to sell the product to residents with pampered felines.

As the history blog The Hatching Cat recounts, what Gottlieb didn’t know was that the neighborhood was also home to plenty of feral cats with voracious appetites. As Gottlieb made his way around the neighborhood, a handful of stray cats seized upon some leaves that had fallen out of his basket and began writhing and rolling around on the ground. Soon, even more kitties joined in, and “jumped up at his baskets, rubbed themselves against his legs, mewing, purring, and saying complimentary things about him,” according to an August 19, 1909 article in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch.

Gottlieb tried to frighten the cats away, according to The Washington Times’s account of the event, but the persistent animals wouldn’t budge. “All of them, rich and poor, aristocrats from the sofa cushions near the front windows and thin plebians from the areaways struggled mightily to get into the two baskets of catnip,” the Times wrote. Soon, Gottlieb found himself surrounded by somewhere between 30 and 40 cats, each one of them clamoring for his goods.

When he eventually spotted a policeman, Gottlieb thought he’d found an ally against the cats. Instead, Sergeant John F. Higgins promptly arrested Gottlieb for inciting a crowd. (“Why don’t you arrest the catnip?” Gottlieb asked him, according to the Times. “That is collecting the crowd. Not I.”)

Trailed by several cats, Higgins and Gottlieb made their way to a police station on East 104th Street. But when they arrived, authorities couldn’t decide whether or not the salesman had actually broken any laws.

“We can’t hold this man,” Lieutenant Lasky, the officer who received the arrest report, said. “The law says a man must not cause a crowd of people to collect. The law doesn’t say anything about cats.”

“The law doesn’t say anything about people,” Higgins replied. “It says ‘a crowd.’ A crowd of cats is certainly a crowd.” Amid this debate, a station cat named Pete began fighting with the invading felines, and, with the help of some policemen, eventually drove the catnip-hungry kitties out of the building.

Gottlieb was eventually released, and even driven home in a patrol wagon—all while being chased by a few lingering cats, still hot on the trail of his now regrettable merchandise.

[h/t The Hatching Cat]

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