"Tweet Me," "Mommy Issues" and More Offbeat Valentine's Day Candy Hearts

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If you're a fan of chalky candy (I am!), you've probably noticed that Necco's Sweethearts Conversation Hearts have gotten a bit of an overhaul in the past couple of years. Not only are the flavors different, to the chagrin of many, but the sayings have joined the rest of us in the 21st century as well.

It's not the first time the conversation has changed. In the mid-'90s, the basic Sweethearts were given a small update to get rid of some of the outdated sayings, but replacement gems like “Fax Me” and “Beep Me” quickly became obsolete again. Then, throughout the naughts, Necco added a handful of themed sayings every year. For example, 2009 was a cooking theme, which resulted in sayings such as "Top Chef" and "Table 4 Two." The hearts got a total overhaul in 2010 when Necco let candy connoisseurs vote on 10 new sayings for the first time in the company's history. The winners included “Tweet Me” and “Text Me,” among others that aren’t technology-oriented.

If Tweeting and texting don't trip your trigger, though, here are a few more interesting sayings from a post that originally ran last Valentine's Day.

1. “Forks.” Before you start wondering why Necco has decided to pay tribute to utensils, you should know that this one is from the Twilight-themed Conversation Hearts that hit stores in 2009. In case you’re not a Twi-hard, Forks is the name of the town where most of the action takes place.

2. “Mommy Issues.” This one comes to you from BitterSweets, a line of candy that includes themes such as Dumped, Dejected, Dysfunctional. Other awesome sayings include “U left seat up,” “Aging Poorly,” and “Pwned! Meh.”

3. “Nice t***.” Whoops.

What was probably a joke by a bored Brach’s assembly line employee ended up being not so funny when a 12-year-old California girl found it in her bag of candy in 2011. Check out a picture of the offending confection at Geekologie.

4. “Please send a lock of your hair by return mail.” Back in the early days of what were then called “Motto Hearts,” the concept was a bit different – instead of being printed right on the candy, candy makers did it up fortune-cookie style by putting slips of paper inside of little crispy candies. And the shapes weren’t just restricted to hearts – others included watches, baseballs and envelopes.

5. “Married in Pink, He will take to drink.” Although Necco started using vegetable coloring and a stamp to print sayings directly on the candy in the 1860s, they didn’t stop with the ridiculously long sayings. They were popular at weddings, hence the charming saying here. Others included the rhyme stretch “Married in satin, Love will not be lasting” and “Married in white, You have chosen right.”

6. “Stud Muffin.” Perhaps a bit risque for the children’s candy here in the U.S., “Stud muffin” is on the U.K. equivalent of Conversation Hearts, cleverly called Love Hearts.

7. “Let’s Read.” Nice, and to that I say, “Yes, please.” But is that really Valentine’s Day material? Is it a euphemism? Is that what the kids are saying these days?

8. “Get My Drift.” Necco added some weather-themed hearts in 2009 called “Love’s in the Forecast,” the pickup line your local weatherman uses when he goes out for drinks.

9. “You are gay.” It didn’t mean the same thing back when it was originally printed, which is why Necco pulled it from the ranks for being “outdated,” along with “Dig it.”

10. “Odyssey.” A bit cryptic for a piece of candy, perhaps, but it was part of the 2001 theme “Limitless love.” 2001… odyssey… get it?

Not a fan of the chalky taste of the candies, but like the way they look? DIYers have tons of ideas for you, including a wreath, framed art and jewelry.

February 14, 2012 - 10:30am
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