The Weird Week in Review

Police and Zookeepers Chase Papier Mâché Rhino

The Ueno Zoo in Tokyo, Japan, holds annual escaped animal drills for zookeepers and emergency responders. However, there is no way to hold these drills using rare and possibly dangerous zoo animals. This week, the drill was held to train workers in how to deal with a rhinoceros on the loose, using a rhino made of papier mâché with two men underneath to provide the action. The rhino even attacked a zookeeper and had to be pushed away with sticks. Zoo visitors enjoyed the spectacle, which was recorded on video.

Man Adopts Girlfriend, Other Children Sue

John Goodman of Palm Beach, Florida, is facing a wrongful death lawsuit that could ruin him financially. As his assets are facing possible seizure, he legally adopted his 42-year-old girlfriend, Heather Ann Hutchins. She therefore is entitled to a share of a $300 million trust fund set aside for Goodman's children. The trust would be untouchable if Goodman loses the lawsuit. The millionaire did not tell the judge in the adoption case about the lawsuit, nor did he tell his ex-wife or two biological children about the adoption. The two teenagers were surprised to hear the news, and are now suing their father to have the adoption of Hutchins set aside.

Police Officer Chased Himself

In a story that was shared with a monthly police magazine, a police officer in Sussex, England, ended up chasing himself around for twenty minutes. A CCTV (closed circuit TV) operator saw a suspicious man on the streets, and called a plainclothes officer for help. The operator gave directions to the areas where the suspicious man was caught on camera, and the officer always seemed to be close, but could not see any evidence of the man. That is, until they realized that the "suspicious character" was actually the plainclothes officer! The date of the misadventure has been lost in the retelling, as all police officers involved were too busy laughing.

Bomb Squad Finds Schrodinger's Cat Alive

A mysterious box appeared in a parking lot at Erie Community College campus in Amherst, New York, last Friday afternoon. The state police bomb squad responded and took an x-ray of the sealed box, which showed a cat inside! Police turned the cat over to the local SPCA. Gina Browning of the Tonawanda SPCA says the cat is okay.

"The cat was not malnourished, not dehydrated, didn't need any kind of veterinary care. So, it had a happy ending. What concerns me is the people capable of doing this might be capable of doing something worse," Browning said.

Just who would put a cat in a taped up box and leave it in a parking lot remains a mystery at this point.

Capt. Camilleri said, "Right now it doesn't appear there's really much to follow up on. It didn't have any identification on the box or anything like that."

The upside to this is that the cat, named "Truffle," is fine, healthy and back with her owner. Tracking down the person responsible is unlikely, if not impossible.

If found, the persons responsible could be charged with animal cruelty. Even Schrodinger never wanted to try his famous thought experiment on a real cat.

Toddler in Vending Machine Hands Out Toys

Three-year-old Noah Jeffrey wanted a toy so badly that he climbed into a claw machine at a restaurant in Ballarat, Victoria, Australia. You've read stories of children in vending machines before, but Noah took the adventure to a new level when he started handing toys out to other children who gathered around the machine! Then his mother saw him. She tried to get Noah to climb back out, but he didn't want to. She finally told him he would have to come down the chute to get a toy, and she helped him get past a barrier on the way. Noah managed to get out of the machine before the fire brigade arrived to rescue him.

Pennsylvania's Purple Squirrel

Percy and Connie Emert of Jersey Shore, Pennsylvania, trap squirrels in their yard to protect their bird feeders from raids. They normally release the squirrels elsewhere, but one squirrel stood out from the rest. Connie Emert saw a purple squirrel several times, but her husband did not believe her. Then it was caught in their squirrel trap Sunday and photographed. They relocated the purple squirrel on Tuesday, but those who saw the pictures are trying to figure out where the color came from. One theory is that it fell into a portable toilet and was covered in chemicals. Another is that it ingested too much bromide from molluscs or some other source. Or it could have been dyed. (Thanks, Brendan!)

Don't Bring a Crack Pipe to Drug Court

Stanley Ramos was arrested in Manatee County, Florida, on New Year's Eve for possession of a crack pipe, which a sheriff's deputy said was in plain view in Ramos' backpack. Ramos had a hearing Tuesday in connection with the case at the Manatee County Courthouse. As he was passing through the building's security checkpoint, he was found to be in possession of another crack pipe. Ramos completed his court appearance and was then arrested on a second charge of possessing drug paraphernalia.

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Pierluigi Luceri, Flickr // CC BY-NC-ND 2.0
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Two Human Toes Were Stolen From an Anatomy Exhibit
Pierluigi Luceri, Flickr // CC BY-NC-ND 2.0
Pierluigi Luceri, Flickr // CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

A 28-year-old New Zealand man walked into an anatomy exhibition with 10 toes and walked out with 12. We don't know why or how he did it, but the man stole two human toes from a Body Worlds display in Auckland last month, The New Zealand Herald reports.

The unnamed man appeared in court Monday and pleaded guilty to improperly interfering with the corpse "of an unknown person" and purloining two toes, which alone are valued at about $3800. The motivation for the human remains heist wasn't stated. (Fulfilling a dare seems a likely explanation, or maybe he's just a fan of The Big Lebowski.)

Whatever the reason may be, the story has a happy ending, at least: The digits have since been returned to their rightful place in the "Vital" exhibit, which explores the human body in motion. "Vital," which will remain open in Auckland until July 13, is one of several traveling exhibitions curated by Body Worlds. Two other Body Worlds exhibits are currently on view in the U.S., including "RX" (showcasing the effects of disease) in Toledo, Ohio, and "Animal Inside Out" (an "anatomical safari") in Richmond, Virginia.

The bodies, all of which are donated for exhibition purposes, are preserved via plastination, a process that "replaces bodily fluids and soluble fat in specimens with fluid plastics that harden after vacuum-forced impregnation," according to the Body Worlds website. More than 16,000 people around the world have signed up to donate their bodies after their deaths.

[h/t The New Zealand Herald]

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Dominique Faget, AFP/Getty Images
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David Lynch's Amazon T-Shirt Shop is as Surreal as His Movies
Dominique Faget, AFP/Getty Images
Dominique Faget, AFP/Getty Images

David Lynch, the celebrated director behind baffling-but-brilliant films like Eraserhead, Blue Velvet, Mulholland Drive, and Twin Peaks, is now selling his equally surreal T-shirts on Amazon.

As IndieWire reports, each shirt bears an image of one of Lynch’s paintings or photographs with an accompanying title. Some of his designs are more straightforward (the shirts labeled “House” and “Whale” feature, respectively, drawings of a house and a whale), while others are obscure (the shirt called “Chicken Head Tears” features a disturbing sculpture of a semi-human face).

This isn’t the first time Lynch has ventured into pursuits outside of filmmaking. Previously, he has sold coffee, designed furniture, produced music, hosted daily weather reports, and published a book about his experience with transcendental meditation. Art, in fact, falls a little closer to Lynch’s roots; the filmmaker trained for years at the Pennsylvania Academy of the Fine Arts before making his mark in Hollywood.

Lynch’s Amazon store currently sells 57 T-shirts, ranging in size from small to triple XL, all for $26 each. As for our own feelings on the collection, we think they’re best reflected by this T-shirt named “Honestly, I’m Sort of Confused.”

Check out some of our favorites below:

T-shirt that says "Honestly, I'm Sort of Confused"
"Honestly, I'm Sort of Confused"

Buy it on Amazon

T-shirt with a drawing of a sleeping bird on it
"Sleeping Bird"

Buy it on Amazon

T-shirt that says Peace on Earth over and over again. The caption is pretty on the nose.
"Peace on Earth"

Buy it on Amazon

T-shirt with an image of a screaming face made out of turkey with ants in its mouth
"Turkey Cheese Head"

Buy it on Amazon

T-shirt with an odd sculpted clay face asking if you know who it is. You get the idea.
"I Was Wondering If You Know Who I Am?"

Buy it on Amazon

T-shirt with an image of a sculpted head that is not a chicken. It is blue, though.
"Chicken Head Blue"

Buy it on Amazon

T-shirt with a drawing of a lobster on it. Below the drawing, the lobster is labeled with the word lobster. Shocking, I know.
"Lobster"

Buy it on Amazon

T-shirt with an abstract drawing of what is by David Lynch's account, at least, a cowboy
"Cowboy"

Buy it on Amazon

[h/t IndieWire]

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