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The Late Movies: Dumbness, Insanity, Celine Dion Screaming, and Billy Joel

Last week I pointed to the unbelievably wonderful Brother IntelliFax 2800 App Store. I wondered -- who made that video? Well, it's Mike Lacher, proprietor of the delightfully weird and sometimes NSFW Wonder-Tonic. Tonight, I round up the five videos Wonder-Tonic has posted on YouTube. They're really weird. Most of them are unwatchable. But at the same time, there's something wonderful about knowing that somebody took the time to make this stuff, and thousands of people have watched the videos -- or at least the beginnings of them.

World War I Explained in 5 PowerPoint Slides

Let's start with one that won't cause your brain to explode. In this, Lacher has created one of the most hilariously horrible PowerPoint presentations ever, making liberal use of sound effects, animation, and inappropriate transitions. My favorite line: "Germany = Economic Problems. Germany Loses." (Sorry, spoiler alert!)

Celine Dion Screams For 1.5 Minutes

In this completely insane video, Celine Dion goes for a high note, and that note is looped for ninety seconds. It's hypnotizing and freakish -- you'll either laugh, cry, or turn the damn thing off. My favorite YouTube comment: "I FINALLY? UNDERSTAND. LIFE HAS LED ME HERE."

All Of Billy Joel's Greatest Hits Played At Once

I had this album in middle school, and I guess now the internet has brought it back to me. This is every track from the first disc of The Essential Billy Joel, played simultaneously. Warning: may cause complete insanity. Zip to about 5 minutes to hear slightly saner cacophonous horror.

Favorite YouTube comment: "I accidentally played three of these videos at? once. Needless to say, I became a God."

"I Am The Cute One" by the Olsen Twins at 25% Speed

Exactly what it says it is. If you actually watch the whole nine minutes, either your brain melts or you get a prize. (Sorry: the prize is that your brain melts.)

This video is roughly as unwatchable as the Billy Joel one is unlistenable. I'm pretty sure that mandatory viewing of this video would qualify as torture under the Geneva Convention.

The Brother IntelliFax 2800 App Store

This only exists to prove that Mike Lacher is very good at the internet, and is not completely insane.

You're Welcome/I'm Sorry

I had to do it. I think the Billy Joel thing planted a mind-virus in my brain that made me subject you all to this. If you actually watched these, I salute you, dear reader! And please, please take a nap or put an ice-pack on your head.

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How to Perform the Star Wars Theme—On Calculators
Star Wars © & TM 2015 Lucasfilm Ltd. All Rights Reserved.
Star Wars © & TM 2015 Lucasfilm Ltd. All Rights Reserved.

The iconic Star Wars theme has been recreated with glass harps, theremins, and even cat meows. Now, Laughing Squid reports that the team over at YouTube channel It’s a small world have created a version that can be played on calculators.

The channel’s math-related music videos feature covers of popular songs like Luis Fonsi’s "Despacito," Ed Sheeran’s "Shape of You," and the Pirates of the Caribbean theme, all of which are performed on two or more calculators. The Star Wars theme, though, is played across five devices, positioned together into a makeshift keyboard of sorts.

The video begins with a math-musician who transcribes number combinations into notes. Then, they break into an elaborate practice chord sequence on two, and then four, calculators. Once they’re all warmed up, they begin playing the epic opening song we all know and love, which you can hear for yourself in all its electronic glory below.

[h/t Laughing Squid]

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holidays
Bleat Along to Classic Holiday Tunes With This Goat Christmas Album
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Feeling a little Grinchy this month? The Sweden branch of ActionAid, an international charity dedicated to fighting global poverty, wants to goat—errr ... goad—you into the Christmas spirit with their animal-focused holiday album: All I Want for Christmas is a Goat.

Fittingly, it features the shriek-filled vocal stylings of a group of festive farm animals bleating out classics like “Jingle Bells,” “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer,” and “O Come All Ye Faithful.” The recording may sound like a silly novelty release, but there's a serious cause behind it: It’s intended to remind listeners how the animals benefit impoverished communities. Goats can live in arid nations that are too dry for farming, and they provide their owners with milk and wool. In fact, the only thing they can't seem to do is, well, sing. 

You can purchase All I Want for Christmas is a Goat on iTunes and Spotify, or listen to a few songs from its eight-track selection below.

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