The Late Movies: Dumbness, Insanity, Celine Dion Screaming, and Billy Joel
Last week I pointed to the unbelievably wonderful Brother IntelliFax 2800 App Store. I wondered -- who made that video? Well, it's Mike Lacher, proprietor of the delightfully weird and sometimes NSFW Wonder-Tonic. Tonight, I round up the five videos Wonder-Tonic has posted on YouTube. They're really weird. Most of them are unwatchable. But at the same time, there's something wonderful about knowing that somebody took the time to make this stuff, and thousands of people have watched the videos -- or at least the beginnings of them.
World War I Explained in 5 PowerPoint Slides
Let's start with one that won't cause your brain to explode. In this, Lacher has created one of the most hilariously horrible PowerPoint presentations ever, making liberal use of sound effects, animation, and inappropriate transitions. My favorite line: "Germany = Economic Problems. Germany Loses." (Sorry, spoiler alert!)
Celine Dion Screams For 1.5 Minutes
In this completely insane video, Celine Dion goes for a high note, and that note is looped for ninety seconds. It's hypnotizing and freakish -- you'll either laugh, cry, or turn the damn thing off. My favorite YouTube comment: "I FINALLY? UNDERSTAND. LIFE HAS LED ME HERE."
All Of Billy Joel's Greatest Hits Played At Once
I had this album in middle school, and I guess now the internet has brought it back to me. This is every track from the first disc of The Essential Billy Joel, played simultaneously. Warning: may cause complete insanity. Zip to about 5 minutes to hear slightly saner cacophonous horror.
Favorite YouTube comment: "I accidentally played three of these videos at? once. Needless to say, I became a God."
"I Am The Cute One" by the Olsen Twins at 25% Speed
Exactly what it says it is. If you actually watch the whole nine minutes, either your brain melts or you get a prize. (Sorry: the prize is that your brain melts.)
This video is roughly as unwatchable as the Billy Joel one is unlistenable. I'm pretty sure that mandatory viewing of this video would qualify as torture under the Geneva Convention.
The Brother IntelliFax 2800 App Store
This only exists to prove that Mike Lacher is very good at the internet, and is not completely insane.
You're Welcome/I'm Sorry
I had to do it. I think the Billy Joel thing planted a mind-virus in my brain that made me subject you all to this. If you actually watched these, I salute you, dear reader! And please, please take a nap or put an ice-pack on your head.