Sexy Beast Perfume, The Furcedes & 8 Other Lavish Dog Gifts

Dog perfume is seen on sale at a luxury hotel for dogs and cats.
Dog perfume is seen on sale at a luxury hotel for dogs and cats.
Joe Raedle, Getty Images

Dogs are generally easy creatures to shop for, but what do you get the dog that has everything? Consider this list your guide—or a reality check—as you put the finishing touches on your holiday shopping this week. For the record, I know that my dog will be perfectly content with a large bag of Beggin' Strips and a new bone.

1. Sexy Beast Dog Fragrance

perfume If you're thinking about spending $65 on a 3.4 ounce bottle of Sexy Beast's signature dog fragrance, a "highly addictive, classic blend of bergamot, vanilla, mandarin, and nutmeg oils," you should at least consider spending a little more for a limited edition version encrusted in Swarovski crystals. The sparkly bottle is hand-numbered, engraved with your dog's name, and costs a cool $850. Why dog perfume? Because, like it says on Sexy Beast's website, giving your dog a bone is so 80s.

2. Jog A Dog Treadmill

dog-treadmillYour pooch might need a few spritzes of Sexy Beast after a workout on the Jog A Dog, the gold standard of canine treadmills. The Jog A Dog, which has been refined over more than 30 years since company founder George Hyland developed the first model in the 1970s, is the perfect gift for the pooch who's hoping to shed his paunch in the new year and the owner who's too lazy to walk him. Among its many benefits, the Jog A Dog helps pups develop muscle strength and stamina, exercise in adverse weather, and maintain a vibrant coat year-round. The Jog A Dog comes in four sizes, with an adjustable incline setting up to 11 degrees. The DC4, for the smallest dogs, weighs 84 pounds and costs $1,195. The DC7, for the largest dogs, weighs 261 pounds and costs $2,995.

3. Brick Estate Dog House

dog-mansion

There's no word on whether Obama's first-time home buyer tax credit applies to this monstrosity, which was created for a celebrity through Beyond the Crate for the low, low price of $25,000. This particular house includes running water, lighting, air conditioning, and heat. Designers can create a house for your dog that is perfectly scaled to match your own house, or something completely different. It's up to you and your dog. But mainly you.

4. Cape Cod Kennel

dog-house

Doowaggle, which specializes in dog houses, offers two luxury models, including the Cape Cod Kennel shown here. The house costs $2,695 and comes as a kit with all of the necessary hardware for assembly. Rain gutters, however, are not included. The Cape Code Kennel includes a 4-foot by 8-foot enclosed area for your dog and two working windows with screens. If the Cape Cod model isn't your style, Doowaggle also offers a Victorian luxury house kit.

5. Helmutt House

helmuttThere's finally a way to shelter your dog and let the neighbors know where your college football loyalties lie. The Helmutt House is heavy duty and weather resistant, and promises to keep your dog warm or cool in style. The standard size Helmutt House retails for $399, and even if you don't have a dog, it makes one heck of a lawn ornament. Company headquarters are in Osage Beach, Mo., which explains why the Missouri State Bears are one of 15 NCAA teams—along with the Georgia and Mississippi State Bulldogs—currently available. According to the company's website, NFL teams will be available soon.

6. Designer Clothes

designer-dog You could get lost for hours browsing the selection of dog clothes on sites such as Bling Bling Poochies, if canine apparel inspired by luxury designers is your thing. From Aberpup & Fido to Burbaby and Christian Dioggie, Bling Bling Poochies has you—and your dog—covered. The all-inclusive outlet has apparel for big and small dogs, a size chart, and a scrapbook of customer-submitted photos. The Posh Puppy Boutique's collection includes a pair of $32 pink leopard hot pants.

7. Armoire

armoire-dog Your dog is going to need a place to keep all his designer duds and the PL Bon Armoire, available for $200 from Uptown Poochie, is the perfect solution. From the site's description, this piece of furniture "neatly organizes and protects your pet's apparel while keeping outfits within convenient reach." No one likes a dog who leaves his clothes all over the floor.

8. Furcedes

dog-car

While less privileged dogs wake up on towels or traditional padded dog beds, your dog will be ready to tackle the day after a great night's sleep in the luxurious Furcedes. Features of the Furcedes include a removable, machine-washable ultra-soft plush cover, plump poly-fill interior cushion, and an "LA Dog" license plate. The Furcedes retails for $250-$350.

9. Diamond Collars

i-love-dogs

He went to Jared? No, he went to I Love Dogs. It takes about 6 to 8 weeks to produce one of their diamond collars, which were featured on Dogtime.com's list of the top 10 luxury dog gifts. You'll have to call for a price, but the Amour Amour, the most exquisite collar in La Collection de Bijoux, features over 1,600 hand-set diamonds, 52 carats, and crocodile leather. From the website: "'Amour' means 'love' in French, and Amour Amour represents the love you have for your dog, and the love your dog has for you. Its striking design is inspired by this special bond that lasts forever." Perhaps a better name would be Cher Cher.

10. Luxury Travel Kit

travel-kit

The Global Gallivanter Trunk by Lila Paws is the perfect gift for the doggie on the go. The handcrafted trunk, which doubles as a bed, includes a pet passport holder, water bowl, bone-shaped cushion, leash and collar holders, and plenty of room for towels and puppy apparel. The Scandinavian leather case with damask fabric interior costs about $2,300.

Glow-in-the-Dark Star Wars Undies Have Arrived

MeUndies
MeUndies

Star Wars geekery has been taken to the next level. Underwear brand MeUndies just unveiled a new pattern that bears the likenesses of several of the space opera's most iconic characters and glows like a lightsaber when it gets dark outside.

The original pattern was hand-drawn by the MeUndies team, and it features Chewbacca, Yoda, R2-D2, C-3PO, Darth Vader, and a Stormtrooper. According to the company, it’s the first time a Star Wars print has featured characters from both the Dark Side and the Rebel Alliance together.

And naturally, the stars and Star Wars logos glow in the dark. The underwear is made from a fiber called Lenzing MicroModal, which is derived from beechwood trees and is said to be three times softer than cotton.

Star Wars boxers for men
MeUndies

Star Wars panties for women
MeUndies

Men’s undies, priced at $24, come in four styles: trunks, boxers, briefs, and boxer briefs. Women’s options include a cheeky brief, bikini, or boyshort, all of which cost $18 apiece. However, if you sign up for a MeUndies membership, $4 to $8 will be taken off each pair, and you’ll also gain access to exclusive prints and lower member prices. MeUndies carries sizes ranging from XS to 3XL and ships to the U.S. and Canada, as well as some other international locations.

Head on over to the MeUndies website to pick up a pair for yourself or for the Star Wars fanatic in your life, and remember: When you wear these undies, the Force will be with you, always.

The Super Mario Bros. Theme Song Has Lyrics You've Probably Never Heard

iStock
iStock

Anyone who owned a Nintendo Entertainment System as a kid likely has the Super Mario Bros. theme song committed to memory—or at least part of it, anyway. In 1985, Nintendo confirmed that the iconic, 8-bit tune has official lyrics that most fans of the video game have never heard.

According to Nerdist, the Mario song didn't have lyrics originally. Super Mario Bros. debuted to the world in 1985, and everything about the game's hero, including his poppy theme music composed by Koji Kondo, became a sensation. Shortly after its release, a Japanese radio station called on fans to submit lyrics to go with the catchy score. Nintendo saw one of the submissions and was so impressed that it decided to record the lyrics to music and release the song on vinyl.

In English, the song opens “Today, full of energy, Mario is still running, running / Go save Princess Peach! Go!" Characters and creatures from the Mario universe, like Goomba, Lakitu, and Cheep Cheep, are all name-dropped.

After reading the full lyrics, you can listen to the recorded version above, which sounds a lot catchier in the original Japanese.

Today, full of energy, Mario is still running, running
Go save Princess Peach! Go!
Today, full of energy, Mario runs
Today, full of energy, jumping!
Today, full of energy, searching for coins
Today, keep going, Mario!
Get a mushroom—it’s Super Mario!
Get a flower—it’s Fire Mario!
Goomba! Troopa! Buzzy Beetle! Beat them all!
Mario is always full of energy and strong!

Today, full of energy, Mario is still running, running
Go and beat the Koopa tribe, go!
Today, full of energy, Mario runs
Today, full of energy, jumping!
Today, full of energy, searching for coins
Today, keep going, Mario!
Get a star—become invincible!
Quickly, go save Princess Peach!
Lakitu! Blooper! Cheep Cheep! Beat them all!
Mario is always full of energy and strong!

Today, full of energy, Mario is still running, running
He’s made it to the castle and gets fireworks!
Lightly sidestepping the Hammer Bros.
Show the last of your power, Mario!
It’s been a long journey but it’s nearly at an end
You’ve done it, you’ve done it! You’ve defeated Bowser!
Princess Peach says “thank you”
Mario’s got a great big heart!
Mario’s adventure is over for now, but
Mario’s dream lives forever ...

[h/t Nerdist]

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