CLOSE
Original image

Required Viewing: "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace" 70-min Critique

Original image

Over the past week, I've been told over and over to watch this series of videos, but resisted until the weekend. I mean, how could it truly be so awesome? I don't care about Star Wars, why would I find this funny? 70 minutes? How could I find time for this? I can now only regret those long days that I deprived myself of the wonderousness of this bizarre, hilariously nerdy "review" of Star Wars: The Phantom Menace. I debated posting it here because it does use some spicy language (within ten seconds, the first f-bomb is dropped), but guys, come on. You need to watch this. You'll know within the first few minutes whether it's your kind of thing. And if it is, you've got SEVENTY MINUTES OF IT.

Let me break it down for you: this dude makes movie reviews and puts them up on YouTube. He's been doing it for a while (I strongly recommend his 2008 review of Star Trek: Generations, which came roughly 14 years after the film was released). Through the reviews, you see his analysis of each movie's particular failings, including detailed analyses of plot holes and explanations of how to make film -- in case George Lucas is watching.

Meanwhile, you realize that the reviewer is also playing a character, and he reveals bits of his character within each review. (Talking about various deceased family members, etc.) At various points the review falls off the rails entirely, as in Part 2 (below) when the reviewer rants about his "medications" and then offers to mail pizza rolls to anyone who leaves a comment on "this web zone." It's brilliant. Funny, often inappropriate, genuinely insightful -- what more could you want from a web video?

Tip: if you are not immediately hooked, wait at least until he says "protagonist" for the second or third time. Trust me. If you get through all seven parts, maybe you can get yourself a pizza roll.

Part 1

"Really, how hard could it be to screw up? It's like screwing up mashed potatoes: you boil the water, pour the packet...."

Part 2

"It's almost mind-boggling how complex the awfulness is."

Part 3

"Now this is where it gets complex, my lovelies. So I think this is what happened -- I'm not sure -- but Palpatine wanted to create a crisis on Naboo so that the naive young queen would propose a vote of No Confidence for Chancellor Velorum. This would lead to Palpatine getting elected in his place, right? Like, I mean, that's the plot? I think?" Also, THE FRENCH REVOLUTION.

Part 4

"Invasion...of boring!"

Part 5

"If you ask me, Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan Kenobi should have been combined into one character, called Obi-Wan Kenobi."

Part 6

"Please, God, make it stop, make it end." ... "So we're back to the three guys we know nothing about fighting each other in a scene we have no interest in. ... Hey, maybe this'll finally get good! Maybe I'll get emotionally involved!"

Part 7

"The Ending Multiplication Effect."

Did You Watch Them All?

If you want a pizza roll, make a comment on this web zone. I can't promise anything about the pizza rolls, I'm just saying make a comment and then go buy yourself a pizza roll.

arrow
Art
Artist Makes Colorful Prints From 1990s VHS Tapes

A collection of old VHS tapes offers endless crafting possibilities. You can use them to make bird houses, shelving units, or, if you’re London-based artist Dieter Ashton, screen prints from the physical tape itself.

As Co.Design reports, the recent London College of Communication graduate was originally intrigued by the art on the cover of old VHS and cassette tapes. He planned to digitally edit them as part of a new art project, but later realized that working with the ribbons of tape inside was much more interesting.

To make a print, Ashton unravels the film from cassettes and VHS tapes collected from his parents' home. He lets the strips fall randomly then presses them into tight, tangled arrangements with the screen. The piece is then brought to life with vibrant patterns and colors.

Ashton has started playing with ways to incorporate themes and motifs from the films he's repurposing into his artwork. If the movie behind one of his creations isn’t immediately obvious, you can always refer to its title. His pieces are named after movies like Backdraft, Under Siege, and that direct-to-video Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen classic Passport to Paris.

Screen print made from an old VHS tape.

Screen print made from an old VHS tape.

Screen print made from an old VHS tape.

Screen print made from an old VHS tape.

Screen print made from an old VHS tape.

Screen print made from an old VHS tape.

[h/t Co.Design]

All images courtesy of Dieter Ashton

Original image
iStock
arrow
Pop Culture
5 Bizarre Comic-Con News Stories from Years Past
Original image
iStock

At its best, Comic-Con is a friendly place where like-minded people can celebrate their pop culture obsessions, and each other. And no one can make fun of you, no matter how lazy your cosplaying might be. You might think that at its worst, it’s just a series of long lines of costumed fans and small stores crammed into a convention center. But sometimes, throwing together 100,000-plus people from around the world in what feels like a carnival-type atmosphere where anything goes can have less than stellar results. Here are some highlights from past Comic-Con-tastrophes.

1. MAN IN HARRY POTTER T-SHIRT STABS ANOTHER MAN IN THE FACE—WITH A PEN

In 2010, two men waiting for a Comic-Con screening of the Seth Rogen alien comedy Paul got into a very adult argument about whether one of them was sitting too close to the other. Unable to come to a satisfactory conclusion with words, one man stabbed the other in the face with a pen. According to CNN, the attacker was led away wearing handcuffs and a Harry Potter T-shirt. In the aftermath, some Comic-Con attendees dealt with the attack in an oddly fitting way: They cosplayed as the victim, with pens protruding from bloody eye sockets.

2. MEMORABILIA THIEVES INVADE NEW YORK

Since its founding in 2006, New York Comic Con has attracted a few sticky-fingered attendees. In 2010, a man stole several rare comics from vendor Matt Nelson, co-founder of Texas’ Worldwide Comics. Just one of those, Whiz Comics No. 1, was worth $11,000, according to the New York Post. A few years later, in 2014, someone stole a $2000 “Dunny” action figure, which artist Jon-Paul Kaiser had painted during the event for Clutter magazine. And those are just the incidents that involved police; lower-scale cases of toys and comics disappearing from booths are an increasingly frustrating epidemic, according to some. “Comic Con theft is an issue we all sort of ignore,” collector Tracy Isenhour wrote on the blog of his company, Needless Essentials, in 2015. “I am here to tell you no more. It’s time for this garbage to stop."

3. CATWOMAN SAVES THE DAY

John Sciulli/Getty Images for Xbox

Adrianne Curry, winner of the first cycle of America’s Next Top Model, has made a career of chasing viral fame. Ironically, it was at Comic-Con in 2014 that Curry did something truly worthy of attention—though there wasn’t a camera in sight. Dressed as Catwoman, she was posing with fans alongside her friend Alicia Marie, who was dressed as Tigra. According to a Facebook post Marie wrote at the time, a fan tried to shove his hands into her bikini bottoms. She screamed, the man ran off, and Curry jumped to action. She “literally took off after dude WITH her Catwoman whip and chased him down, beat his a**,” Marie wrote. “Punched him across the face with the butt of her whip—he had zombie blood on his face—got on her costume.”

4. MAN POSES AS FUGITIVE-SEEKING INVESTIGATOR TO GET INTO VIP ROOM

The lines at Comic-Con are legendary, so one Utah man came up with a novel way to try and skip them altogether. In 2015, Jonathon M. Wall tried to get into Salt Lake Comic Con’s exclusive VIP enclave (normally a $10,000 ticket) by claiming he was an agent with the Air Force Office of Special Investigations, and needed to get into the VIP room “to catch a fugitive,” according to The San Diego Union Tribune. Not only does that story not even come close to making sense, it also adds up to impersonating a federal agent, a crime to which Wall pleaded guilty in April of this year and which carried a sentence of up to three years in prison and a $250,000 fine. In June, prosecutors announced that they were planning to reduce his crime from a felony to a misdemeanor.

5. MAN WALKS 645 MILES TO COMIC-CON, DRESSED AS A STORMTROOPER, TO HONOR HIS LATE WIFE

Michael Buckner/Getty Images for Disney

In 2015, Kevin Doyle walked 645 miles along the California coast to honor his late wife, Eileen. Doyle had met Eileen relatively late in life, when he was in his 50s, and they bonded over their shared love of Star Wars (he even proposed to her while dressed as Darth Vader). However, she died of cancer barely a year after they were married. Adrift and lonely, Doyle decided to honor her memory and their love of Star Wars by walking to Comic-Con—from San Francisco. “I feel like I’m so much better in the healing process than if I’d stayed home,” he told The San Diego Union Tribune.

SECTIONS

More from mental floss studios