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The Weird Week in Review

Jesus Christ Dismissed from Jury Duty

A woman named Jesus Christ was called for jury duty in Birmingham, Alabama this week, but was dismissed for disruptive behavior. Her name was Dorothy Lola Killingworth before she legally changed it.

Court officials told The Birmingham News Tuesday that the 59-year-old was excused because she was disruptive and kept asking questions instead of answering them.

Efforts to reach Christ for comment were unsuccessful.

Elf Arrested Over Dynamite Threat

45-year-old William Caldwell was dressed as an elf when he was arrested at Southlake Mall in Morrow, Georgia. He wasn't working as an elf, but got in line to see Santa Claus. According to police, he told Santa that he had dynamite in his bag. Santa immediately summoned mall security. The shopping center was evacuated, but no explosives were found. Caldwell was arrested on several charges.

Toddler Locked Mom in Closet for Seven Hours

Karen Kilgour of Auckland, New Zealand, was the unintended victim of her 14-month-old son Harry in a game that went horribly wrong. She was tidying up clothing in the toddler's wardrobe when he playfully shut the door on her. The other closets in the home have magnetic locks, but not this one. Kilgour spent several hours trying to open the door, and then hours trying to keep Harry calm as she worried about him. She finally sang her son to sleep, and Kilgour's husband came home about 4:30PM -seven hours after Kilgour was shut in the closet. The family plans to get a handle put on the inside of the closet.

Prime Minister of Vanuatu Fired for Absences

150vanuatuEdward Natapei was the prime minister of Vanuatu until he lost his job as he was attending a meeting of government heads in Port of Spain, Trinidad and Tobago. His trip triggered a rule that says ministers lose their seat if they miss three consecutive legislative sessions without notifying the speaker. While Natapei was gone, an extraordinary session was held to debate the tiny island nation's budget. A new election for prime minister was called for by Maxime Carlot Korman, current speaker and former prime minister himself.

Pig Farts Spark Gas Scare

Residents of Axedale, Australia called authorities when they smelled what they believed to be a gas leak. Firefighters responded to the home and found a 120 kilogram pet pig, which they found to be the source of the gas.

"She got very excited when two trucks and 15 firies turned up and she squealed and farted and squealed and farted," said fire chief Peter Harkins.

"I haven't heard too many pigs fart but I would describe it as very full-on."

The pig's owners were embarrassed over the incident and refused to let the pig be photographed.

Denver Plans to Welcome Aliens

150CloseEncountersIn 2010, Denver voters will have a referendum on the city ballot to approve a new panel called the Extraterrestrial Affairs Commission. If approved, the seven-member commission will develop protocols for establishing diplomatic contact with extraterrestrials. The initiative is the brainchild of Jeff Peckman, who collected over 10,000 signatures to put the referendum on the ballot. Peckman was also behind a vote in 2003 which would have introduced municipal stress-reduction techniques in Denver. The voters rejected that proposal. Peckman says he has seen only one UFO, on the day that Michael Jackson died.

Pornography Study Fails to Find Control Group

Scientists at the University of Montreal designed a study to compare men who watch pornography with men who have never used it. However, the project ran into a roadblock when researchers could not find any men in their 20s who hadn't been exposed to x-rated images and video. In interviews with twenty male college students, researchers found the average age of their first exposure to porn was age ten. The study was not completely abandoned; it was merely redesigned to study men's pornography-using habits.

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Nom & Malc, Flickr // CC BY-NC-ND 2.0
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Food
Cheese Wheel Wedding Cakes Are a Funky Twist on an Old Tradition
Nom & Malc, Flickr // CC BY-NC-ND 2.0
Nom & Malc, Flickr // CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

If there’s ever a time you have permission to be cheesy, it’s on your wedding day. What better way to do so than with a pungent wedding cake made of actual wheels of cheese? According to Elite Daily, cheese wedding cakes are a real option for couples who share an affinity for dairy products.

One of the trailblazers behind the sharp trend is Bath, England-based cheese supplier The Fine Cheese Co. The company offers clients a choice of one of dozens of wedding cake designs. There are bold show-stoppers like the Beatrice cake, which features five tiers of cheese and is priced at $400. For customers looking for something more delicate, there’s the Clara centerpiece, which replaces miniature wedding cakes with mounds of goat cheese. Whether your loved one likes funky Stilton or mellow brie, there’s a cheese cake to satisfy every palate. Flowers are incorporated into each display to make them just as pretty as conventional wedding cakes.

Since The Fine Cheese Co. arranged their first wedding cake in 2002, other cheese suppliers have entered the game. The Cheese Shed in Newton Abbot, England; I.J. Ellis Cheesemongers in Scotland; and Murray’s Cheese in New York will provide cheese wheel towers for weddings or any other special occasion. Of course, there’s nothing stopping you from clearing out the local fromagerie and assembling a cheese cake at home.

[h/t Elite Daily]

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Screenshot via Mount Vernon/Vimeo
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History
The Funky History of George Washington's Fake Teeth
Screenshot via Mount Vernon/Vimeo
Screenshot via Mount Vernon/Vimeo

George Washington may have the most famous teeth—or lack thereof—in American history. But counter to what you may have heard about the Founding Father's ill-fitting dentures, they weren't made of wood. In fact, he had several sets of dentures throughout his life, none of which were originally trees. And some of them are still around. The historic Mount Vernon estate holds the only complete set of dentures that has survived the centuries, and the museum features a video that walks through old George's dental history.

Likely due to genetics, poor diet, and dental disease, Washington began losing his original teeth when he was still a young man. By the time he became president in 1789, he only had one left in his mouth. The dentures he purchased to replace his teeth were the most scientifically advanced of the time, but in the late 18th century, that didn't mean much.

They didn't fit well, which caused him pain, and made it difficult to eat and talk. The dentures also changed the way Washington looked. They disfigured his face, causing his lips to noticeably stick out. But that doesn't mean Washington wasn't grateful for them. When he finally lost his last surviving tooth, he sent it to his dentist, John Greenwood, who had made him dentures of hippo ivory, gold, and brass that accommodated the remaining tooth while it still lived. (The lower denture of that particular pair is now held at the New York Academy of Medicine.)

A set of historic dentures
George Washington's Mount Vernon

These days, no one would want to wear dentures like the ones currently held at Mount Vernon (above). They're made of materials that would definitely leave a bad taste in your mouth. The base that fit the fake teeth into the jaw was made of lead. The top teeth were sourced from horses or donkeys, and the bottom were from cows and—wait for it—people.

These teeth actually deteriorated themselves, revealing the wire that held them together. The dentures open and shut thanks to metal springs, but because they were controlled by springs, if he wanted to keep his mouth shut, Washington had to permanently clench his jaw. You can get a better idea of how the contraption worked in the video from Mount Vernon below.

Washington's Dentures from Mount Vernon on Vimeo.

There are plenty of lessons we can learn from the life of George Washington, but perhaps the most salient is this: You should definitely, definitely floss.

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