I (heart) Oscar
Because we're building up to the Oscars this week (did you miss our first two movie quizzes?), here's a littleÂ spoof I wrote that you might enjoy from our pals over at The Morning News—newly published this morning.
Ever wonder how Oscar's Internet dating profile might read?
I'm here to find a great person for a great time. I want to tremble from head to toe. You'll see lots of ads on here saying stuff like "No games!" or "No drama!" Well, color me eccentric then because I love me some good drama (especially the biographical kind). Though many who've had me consider me extremely attractive, I am by no means a mere trophy. If that's the kind of person you're looking for, do us both a favor and move on to the next profile, please.
* Height: 13.5" (34.3 cm)
* Weight: 8.5 lbs (3.86 kg), zero body fat
* Body type: Buffed
Go giveÂ the rest of the spoofÂ a read and be sure to add The Morning News to your regular bookmarks if you haven't already.