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Laser Portraits, and Other Adolescent Humiliations

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Considering the current wave of early-80s nostalgia that's sweeping the nation, especially teenagers who weren't even embryonic in 1981 -- witness the music of Chromeo, the renewed popularity of ironic feathered haircuts, the fevered demand for Marty McFly's shoes and the market share of American Apparel -- it was only a matter of time before the really embarrassing stuff was unearthed. I'm speaking, of course, of laser portraits -- that most 80s of yearbook photos, the laser-beam backdrop which your parents had to pay a few dollars extra for. (That's right; it was usually the kids themselves who wanted it. And now they're paying the real price.)

Apparently the statute of limitations has passed, because people seem to be uploading their embarrassing 80s-era school portraits to the web at an unprecedented rate -- are there are new blogs popping up every day to celebrate them. A personal favorite (thanks, Higgins) is We Have Lasers!!!!!!. Lasered above: Jeffrey.

But there are many more, a quick perusal of which will help us break down the various species of embarrassing portraits. Via Sexy People, there's the always-strange big prop portrait:

Pictured above: Casey, with Cabbage Patch. (Update: probably NOT a Cabbage Patch.)

I'm not sure this is a style of portrait, but it's definitely a style -- via Rad Dudes:

Another 80s portrait trend was what I like to call "soft focus with strange gloves" --

Thanks to Jennifer and Gina, above.

Lest we forget, there's the classic Sears portrait look, where they truck in the background of your choosing -- and usually several, so you have options!

Above via Sexy People.

We'd love to see your embarrassing adolescent portraits -- especially those with odd backgrounds, props, or other embarrassing anachronisms. Send 'em to!

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Little Baby's Ice Cream
Pizza and Cricket Cake Are Just Some of the Odd Flavors You'll Find at This Philadelphia Ice Cream Shop
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Little Baby's Ice Cream

Ice cream flavors can get pretty out-there, thanks to the growing number of creative scoop shops willing to take risks and broaden their customers’ horizons beyond chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry. Intrepid foodies can cool off with frozen treats that taste like horseradish, foie gras, and avocado, while Philadelphia's Little Baby’s Ice Cream is pushing the boundaries of taste with chilly offerings like everything bagel, Maryland BBQ, ranch, and cricket cake.

Cricket-flavored ice cream, created by Philadelphia-based Little Baby's Ice Cream
Little Baby's Ice Cream

Everything Bagel-flavored ice cream, created by Philadelphia-based Little Baby's Ice Cream
Little Baby's Ice Cream

As Lonely Planet News reports, Little Baby’s Ice Cream launched its first signature “oddball” ice cream—Earl Grey sriracha—in 2011. Since then, its rotating menu has only gotten quirkier. In addition to the aforementioned flavors, customers who swing by Little Baby’s this summer can even try pizza ice cream.

The store created the savory flavor in 2011, to celebrate neighborhood eatery Pizza Brain’s inclusion into Guinness World Records for its vast collection of pizza memorabilia. The savory, Italian-esque snack is made from ingredients like tomato, basil, oregano, salt, and garlic—and yes, it actually tastes like pizza, Little Baby’s co-owner Pete Angevine told Lonely Planet News.

Pizza-flavored ice cream, made by Philadelphia-based Little Baby's Ice Cream
Little Baby's Ice Cream

“Frequently, folks will see it on the menu and be incredulous, then be convinced to taste it, giggle, talk about how surprised they are that it really tastes just like pizza … and then order something else,” Angevine said. “That’s just fine. Just as often though, they’ll end up getting a pizza milkshake!”

Little Baby’s flagship location is in Philadelphia's East Kensington neighborhood, but customers can also sample their unconventional goods at additional outposts in West Philadelphia, Baltimore, and a pop-up stand in Washington, D.C.’s Union Market. Just make sure to bring along a sense of adventure, and to leave your preconceived notions of what ice cream should taste like at home.

[h/t Lonely Planet]

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Warby Parker
Warby Parker Is Giving Away Free Eclipse Glasses in August
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Warby Parker

When this year’s rare “all-American” total solar eclipse comes around on August 21, you’ll want to be prepared. Whether you’re chasing the eclipse to Kentucky or viewing it from your backyard, you’ll need a way to watch it safely. That means an eclipse filter over your telescope, or specially designed eclipse glasses.

For the latter, you can just show up at your nearest Warby Parker, and their eye experts will hand over a pair of eclipse glasses. The stores are giving out the free eye protectors throughout August. The company’s Nashville store is also having an eclipse party to view the celestial event on the day-of.

Get your glasses early, because you don’t want to miss out on this eclipse, which will cross the continental U.S. from Oregon to South Carolina. There are only so many total solar eclipses you’ll get to see in your lifetime, after all.


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