5 Ways Your Dog Could Be Living in the Lap of Luxury

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You guys might remember that I have dogs. Three, to be exact (that's Patton in the picture). Paul and I don't have any kids yet, so these dogs are pretty spoiled. I mean, not celebrity-spoiled to the point that I carry them around in purses and buy them Swarovski-studded collars or anything like that, but they do get a lot of our attention. They get fairly frequent trips to the dog park (which is really just as much entertainment for us as it is for them). Ever since the whole pet food scare, they get rather expensive dog food from a specialty store. They don't get to sleep with us, but they do each have their own little plush doggy beds.

The latest is that we are sending them to doggy daycare. Not every single day "“ no, just once to try it out. It's a half day of grooming and a half day of getting to run amok with other dogs. They have free access to both inside and outside, there are agility courses for them to play on and wading pools if it's nice enough outside. There's a mandatory two-hour nap from noon to 2 p.m.

The best part? There's a Web cam. So we can watch our little heathens and see how they behave with others. Expect my productivity at work to plummet dramatically when the dogs are at daycare.

However, despite doggy daycare and the pricey dog food and the fact that two of them are curled up on my lap as I type this, there are always dogs who are more spoiled than ours. Here are a few signs that your dog is seriously spoiled...

1. A doghouse nicer than my real house

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Retail value $15,000-$20,000. Seriously. Rachel Hunter's dogs call this charming little villa home.

2. A spa membership

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At The Club in Beverly Hills, your dog can enjoy a day of yoga, aromatherapy, massages, Jacuzzi soaks, car service and personalized bedding. I'm sure it's nicer than most hotels I've stayed at.

3. A canopy bed

canopy_bed3.jpgAt only $200, it's a steal! C'mon, it's a small price to pay for your dog's comfort, isn't it? The sad thing is, I'm pretty sure my dogs would be happier in an old, raggedy blanket that they've chewed holes in over the years. Or maybe that's just what I'm telling myself.

4. Doggie tarot cards

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Not like Cesar Millan from the Dog Whisperer, who understands dog behaviors and mind sets well enough to appear to be psychic. Nope, this is the real deal. You use these tarot cards just like the human variety to figure out what your dog (or cat, or bird"¦ it's not limited) is trying to tell you.

5. A $1.8 million dog collar

collar
Forget what I said about Swarovski crystals—apparently that makes me cheap. No, if you really love your dog, you'll buy them this $1.8 million collar studded with 52 carats, including a seven-carat center diamond. Ha. I'm picturing my dogs gnawing the crap out of this the second I got it fastened around one of their necks.

So what do you do for your pets that might be a little, um, out of the ordinary? 'Fess up!

April 2, 2008 - 9:30am
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