Kelvin is Lord!

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If you're planning to worship a dead scientist today, you might as well give it up for Lord Kelvin: Giver of Laws (of thermodynamics). According to the brilliant Kelvin is Lord! website, Lord Kelvin is our only salvation from entropy:

The only path to Conservation from Entropy is through the Lord Kelvin! Only He may Transgress the Immutable Laws of Thermodynamics and allow you to escape the Increase in Entropy that is the Fate of all those who are without Him in their Minds & Hearts. To be Conserved, all you have to do is ask Him. That is all. Ask the Lord Kelvin to come into your Mind & Heart, give yourself over to His Infinite Beatitude. He will instruct you further on how to LIVE your life according to His wishes.

But what is the best method to ask? The road to knowing the wonder that is the Lord Kelvin can be got to via the on-ramp of Kelvinian Meditation (KM). With KM, a scientifically validated technique to cause a local decrease in your personal Entropy, you will lay Trans-Oceanic Communication Cables to the shores of the Land of Kelvin Consciousness. He will hear and see your desire to be Conserved from Entropy and will help you to reach a state of Non-Entropic churning cheerfulness because He Loves and Values you, His Creations!

Lord Kelvin be praised! I can feel the entropy draining from the Æther surrounding me!

Read more on Lord Kelvin, and be sure to check out Kelvin's Kids Club.

For a more, uh, impartial reading of Our Lord Kelvin's life, see Wikipedia on William Thomson, 1st Baron Kelvin.

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March 13, 2008 - 11:07am
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