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The World's Most Annoying Alarm Clocks

I'm not one of those people that needs bombs dropping outside my window to wake up. Depending on various factors I have yet to understand, some nights a sound as gentle as the air-conditioning clicking on or the gentle smell of my cat using the litter box, wafting past my nose from the next room, is enough to wake me. Unfortunately for me and all those like me, I am frequently gifted with roommates who sleep like they're in comas, and are nearly unwakeable come morning. (I usually end up turning their alarms off for them, then poking them rudely in the head until they stir.)

That's why I fear the alarm clocks on this list like the plague -- not because I need them, but because it's very likely that people near me will. Recently, my wife and I came into the possession of the most annoying alarm clock I've ever personally encountered, which is of Japanese vintage. I don't understand what it says, but it sounds a little something like this:

Seriously, just kill me. Kitsch value aside, however, it's not nearly as irritating as the skin-crawlers on our list. For instance:

The climbing clock
Certainly the work of evil geniuses, the climbing clock hangs above your head and starts climbing while it rings. Don't wake up fast enough, and you won't be able to shut it up without a ladder.

The anemone clock
From the Anemone Clock's product literature: "The Anemone Clock is designed to rumble, tremble, and literally bounce away from your beside when the alarm sounds forcing any sleeping beauty out of bed to wrestle it down, pick it up, get shaken awake, and finally turning it off." I can't think of a worse way to wake up.product_anemoneclock1.jpg

Puzzle alarm
It wakes you up by firing four puzzle pieces up in the air, and then it is your task to get the pieces and put them back in the alarm clock - it won't turn off until then. (If you ask me, anyone who can complete puzzles first thing in the morning -- even simple ones -- never went to sleep in the first place.)puzzle.jpg

Chicken and egg problem clock
Which came first, the chicken or the egg? (At 6:15 in the morning, I guarantee you won't care.) To shut this baby off, you have to put all the expelled eggs back in the chicken's hollow body. Perfect for those animal gynecology students who have trouble making early classes. (Also, who ever suggested I needed a problem first thing in the morning? It being super early in the morning is already a problem. So as Jay-Z said, I may have 99 problems -- but this clock ain't one.)egg.jpg

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Netflix's Most-Binged Shows of 2017, Ranked
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Netflix might know your TV habits better than you do. Recently, the entertainment company's normally tight-lipped number-crunchers looked at user data collected between November 1, 2016 and November 1, 2017 to see which series people were powering through and which ones they were digesting more slowly. By analyzing members’ average daily viewing habits, they were able to determine which programs were more likely to be “binged” (or watched for more than two hours per day) and which were more often “savored” (or watched for less than two hours per day) by viewers.

They found that the highest number of Netflix bingers glutted themselves on the true crime parody American Vandal, followed by the Brazilian sci-fi series 3%, and the drama-mystery 13 Reasons Why. Other shows that had viewers glued to the couch in 2017 included Anne with an E, the Canadian series based on L. M. Montgomery's 1908 novel Anne of Green Gables, and the live-action Archie comics-inspired Riverdale.

In contrast, TV shows that viewers enjoyed more slowly included the Emmy-winning drama The Crown, followed by Big Mouth, Neo Yokio, A Series of Unfortunate Events, GLOW, Friends from College, and Ozark.

There's a dark side to this data, though: While the company isn't around to judge your sweatpants and the chip crumbs stuck to your couch, Netflix is privy to even your most embarrassing viewing habits. The company recently used this info to publicly call out a small group of users who turned their binges into full-fledged benders:

Oh, and if you're the one person in Antarctica binging Shameless, the streaming giant just outed you, too.

Netflix broke down their full findings in the infographic below and, Big Brother vibes aside, the data is pretty fascinating. It even includes survey data on which shows prompted viewers to “Netflix cheat” on their significant others and which shows were enjoyed by the entire family.

Netflix infographic "The Year in Bingeing"
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