Worst album covers of all time: the ten

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When I say all time, I mean the future, too. Let's take a look.

10. Ken: By Request Only
I can assure you, Ken, we have only one request.

9. Something Special from Jeff
Poor Jeff looks like death warmed over, from his Herman Munster tan to that funeral director suit. I just hope the "something special" he's got for us doesn't involve that hook. (Or perhaps that's his instrument. After all, Radiohead frontman Thom Yorke played a prosthetic arm on his last solo album.)
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8. Joyce
This 1983 album is self-titled, but serious Joyce fans know it as "The Red Album." One choice cut from this LP is "I Get All Excited."
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7. Heino: Liebe Mutter
Keeping the rose theme going, German singer Heino was on his way to plant this rose bush when he stumbled into the photo studio.
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6. Orleans: Waking and Dreaming
I've had the naked-at-school dream plenty of times. But naked at the photo shoot? Also, notice how the photographer arranged them not according to height, but beardedness.
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5. Mike Terry Live At the Pavilion Theater, Glasgow: Volume 2
I can only imagine Mike Terry sounds a lot like he looks: like Elton John crossed with Liberace and fat, Vegas Elvis.
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4. Freddie Gage: All My Friends Are Dead
Nicknamed the Underworld Preacher, Gage is a reformed drug addict from Texas. This is an album with a good heart: a sermon aimed at teens which tries to tell them the truth about drug abuse. With an album cover like this, though, I'm betting Gage didn't sell a lot of copies to anyone, young or old.
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3. At Play with the Playmates
Do their wives know about this? Good Lord -- these guys look so natural on that bike! But seriously: this 50s vocal trio had a long career, and you can buy this album on Amazon right now.
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2. David Ingles: Satan Has Been Paralyzed
(Satan's not the only one.) Ingles claims his music can heal you, fix your marriage and make you rich.
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1. Cody Matherson: Can I Borrow A Feelin'?
Cody had the great honor of having his album title stolen by the writers of The Simpsons: in the episode "A Milhouse Divided," after Milhouse's dad loses his marriage and hits rock bottom he records a terrible album called "Can I Borrow A Feeling?" Sounds like Matherson should borrow a lawyer.
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If you want more, so much more, check this link out, and this. (Warning: some of these covers are NSFW.)

Previously on mental_floss: 23 Album Covers That Changed Everything.

November 5, 2007 - 2:12am
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