Greg Veis, YouTube Hunter: The Walken Chronicles

The YouTube Hunter is as pleased as any pampered coastal elite to see the Borat movie perform as well as it has. What the YouTube Hunter isn't so pleased about -- what's actually got him scarfing the Xanax again -- is the viral proliferation of Borat imitations across the country. I never thought I'd say this, much less for posterity, but all these hapless Borat imitators are making me wistful for all the hapless Christopher Walken imitators they seem to have replaced. With the exception of a very talented few (including the author of this must-read piece on the man himself), most people who "break out their Walken" in social situations -- not to be too harsh or anything -- should be executed. Slowly. And let's start with this guy.

Honestly, this is the worst Walken ever.

You'd be surprised -- or maybe you wouldn't -- how many people on YouTube are vying for the dubious honor of being the Worst Walken Imitator in the World. There are dozens (dozens!) of self-made videos where some dude just talks into the camera as Christopher Walken. The YouTube Hunter isn't quick to anger, but, for reasons written deep enough into his genetic code that he can't properly express them, this makes the YouTube Hunter very, very angry.

In the name of goodwill, you will not have to endure any more clips from these sad, sexless souls. Instead, you will be treated to the three best Walken imitations presently found on YouTube, and then to two of the best real Walken Walken moments. Walken Walken Walken.

But before we get to the videos, let me make one last plug: again, you will not read a better piece on Christopher Walken than this one. Read it.

Here's a prank by some suburban troublemakers who didn't get the memo from 1997 that said you can wear clothes within three sizes of fitting again. Still, this is very funny, especially the way he says "vanilla shake:"

The only beef the Hunter has with that last clip is that the Walken he believes in is a more benevolent Walken. Here's a dirty, slightly NSFW Walken:

And this is a mix of real Walken and fake. It's amazing how much more real Spacey's Walken seems. Just another way in which Walken makes us question the very nature of reality.

Finally, here's the man at his finest. First, in Fatboy Slim's "Weapon of Choice" video, directed by the ever-sharp Spike Jonze. And last, in Pulp Fiction, delivering a well-hidden heirloom.

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College Board Wants to Erase Thousands of Years From AP World History, and Teachers Aren't Happy
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One would be forgiven for thinking that the Ides of March are upon us, because Julius Caesar is being taken out once again—this time from the Advanced Placement World History exam. The College Board in charge of the AP program is planning to remove the Roman leader, and every other historical figure who lived and died prior to 1450, from high school students’ tests, The New York Times reports.

The nonprofit board recently announced that it would revise the test, beginning in 2019, to make it more manageable for teachers and students alike. The current exam covers over 10,000 years of world history, and according to the board, “no other AP course requires such an expanse of content to be covered over a single school year.”

As an alternative, the board suggested that schools offer two separate year-long courses to cover the entirety of world history, including a Pre-AP World History and Geography class focusing on the Ancient Period (before 600 BCE) up through the Postclassical Period (ending around 1450). However, as Politico points out, a pre-course for which the College Board would charge a fee "isn’t likely to be picked up by cash-strapped public schools," and high school students wouldn't be as inclined to take the pre-AP course since there would be no exam or college credit for it.

Many teachers and historians are pushing back against the proposed changes and asking the board to leave the course untouched. Much of the controversy surrounds the 1450 start date and the fact that no pre-colonial history would be tested.

“They couldn’t have picked a more Eurocentric date,” Merry E. Wiesner-Hanks, who previously helped develop AP History exams and courses, told The New York Times. “If you start in 1450, the first thing you’ll talk about in terms of Africa is the slave trade. The first thing you’ll talk about in terms of the Americas is people dying from smallpox and other things. It’s not a start date that encourages looking at the agency and creativity of people outside Europe.”

A group of teachers who attended an AP open forum in Salt Lake City also protested the changes. One Michigan educator, Tyler George, told Politico, “Students need to understand that there was a beautiful, vast, and engaging world before Europeans ‘discovered’ it.”

The board is now reportedly reconsidering its decision and may push the start date of the course back some several hundred years. Their decision will be announced in July.

[h/t The New York Times]

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North America: East or West Coast?
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